Thinking Up A New Reality

Our spiritual growth has brought us to a point where we know we are creating our reality as we go along. Let us use this spirituality information to think up a reality that serves us and all of humanity.

This article is called “Thinking Up A New Reality”' so we are going to shake up our thinking here a bit. We are going to change the way we are thinking and think different thoughts. Let's get in the same league as Albert Einstein and make him proud. What the heck, let's make ourselves proud. All it takes is a thought of pride. Is that a different thought than you have been thinking?

Forward, onward, don't look back because that is what your ego wants you to do. The ego rules your past, the sacred self rules the present moment.

Whenever I think about the ego, I always come up with this visualization of a person who is trying to make a decision and there is a miniature version of that person on one shoulder dressed up as the devil and a miniature version of the person on the other shoulder dressed up as an angel.

The little devil image is pushing the person to do what he knows is not in his best interest, while the little angel image is reminding the person what the more altruistic choice would be. The way we have structured our society has allowed us to “cheer on” the little devil. We basically scoff at the goodie two-shoes angel figure and side with the character giving us bad advice.

When we make a decision that does not serve us we usually say that “the devil made me do it” and just laugh it away as something that we had no choice over. But wait a minute. That's not being very honest with ourselves. We did have choice. Remember the “angel” figure on the other shoulder? We could have listened to this voice just as easily as we listened to the “little devil” voice. It's all a matter of choice.

What is it that makes us choose to give the “little devil,” the ego, more say in the affairs of our lives than the valid perspective of the “little angel,” our sacred self?

Think about that. Remember, we are thinking up a new reality.

Does it serve us to listen to the ego? In my experience of life it rarely serves me. Sometimes, in the short-term, I will see some benefits come my way that seem to fulfill an immediate need, but when that short-term need is fulfilled the ego wants more. Then, as time goes by, the short-term gratification that came from satisfying my ego is replaced by a realization that my long-term intentions and desires were subverted by the short-term gain. One step forward, two steps back.

Wait a minute. Didn't we just say that we're not going to look back? Let's keep moving forward. One step at a time in the present moment of now.

So where does this ego belong on the spectrum of our belief system? We have revealed to ourselves that there are two paradigms of belief that are available to us. One paradigm says that we are separate from each other, separate from all the physical things that make up the universe and separate from God. The other paradigm says that we are one with all people, one with everything that exists and one with God.

All of our ego-based choices are designed to make us think we are separate beings who have to fend for ourselves because “it's a jungle out there” and the best way to take care of yourself is to believe in the law of “the survival of the fittest.”

Remember, we are here in the realm of the physical universe for a purpose. Our mission is to experience life in all of its different perspectives in order for God to know, through our experiences, all that she knows of as concepts. That is the purpose of our existence.

Let us begin the process of creating the “experience” of “thinking up a new reality.”

by Richard Blackstone

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Learn the Secret to Achieving Maximum Productivity

Many people struggle with trying to balance work, family and other obligations. Have you ever secretly wished that there could be more hours in the day! We all have the same twenty four hours. How is it that some persons get more done in that period of time than most people might in a whole week? Some people do more work than five others, without a sense or overload and overwhelm. Two employees in the same department work side-by-side, but one is five times as productive. How does she achieve this?

The answer is actually quite simple: When you work, work smart and hard. Dive in. Work quickly. Be productive. Be serious. Allow no distractions, interruptions or wastes of your time. Make a prioritized list of activities and methodically pursue each until completed before moving on to the next one.

Many people approach their workday in just the opposite manner. They sluggishly arise from bed after four or five slumber resets of their alarm clock. They go through their routine with little direction. They are on auto-pilot. They eat pastry and coffee if anything at all and step into their car to transport them to work. They listen to Howard Stern or some wanna-be on the way and arrive at work feeling brain dead.

After visiting with other employees for a while and refilling their coffee cups, they settle into their workspace, waiting for whatever the day presents to them. They are always aware of the time. They take numerous restroom and smoke breaks anxiously awaiting their lunch break. They head to the local fast food joint, shove down a burger and fries, using every minute of their lunch hour and then slowly return to the office. The same morning routine re-initiates for the afternoon and they anxiously await the five o'clock hour. They go home, grab a snack, sit back in their chair and proclaim that they had a hectic, tiring day and are now in need of dinner and rest as they fall off to sleep in their Lazy-Boy. Sound familiar? Does that describe your typical day? How does that summary make you feel?

Are you ready for a change? Examine this alternative itinerary:

1. Get the proper amount of restful sleep. Arise promptly and expect a great day!

2. Take a minute to review your goals and plans for the day.

3. Take time to stretch and do a few exercises. It will get your blood flowing.

4. Have a great breakfast, preferably with your family. Try eating two slices of whole wheat toast with Smart Balance margarine, two slices of hot turkey bacon (microwave), 3oz orange juice and a glass of Silk enhanced soy milk. That will energize your morning!

5. Listen to a motivating audio program, a great book or inspiring music on the commute to work.

6. Arrive twenty minutes early. Get your coffee. Make a prioritized "to-list" for the day.

7. Schedule returned calls early, then put the phone in voice mail mode.

8. Close your door and get busy on your list. Allow no interruptions.

9. Work diligently and quickly. Stay organized. Make quick, confident and competent decisions.

10. Check messages before lunch. Return important calls and delegate lesser tasks.

11. Eat a good lunch. Load up on complex carbs, baked chicken or fish. Drink water. No alcohol.

12. Schedule your afternoon like the morning. Work smart. Be diligent.

13. Do not allow other employees to get you off track. Stay focused on your tasks.

14. Have a mid-afternoon power-snack. An apple or orange is a great choice.

15. At the end of the workday, write a new prioritized list for the next day. Make certain that your desk, files and computer are properly organized for a productive next day.

16. Leave. Mentally leave the remaining work there until tomorrow.

17. Relax. Have a light dinner with your family and re-charge and reward yourself by plugging-in to an activity that you enjoy. Get lost in it. Enjoy some exercise by walking, running or simply participating in a sport that you enjoy. The main idea is to un-plug from work-mode and plug-into play mode. Play hard.

18. Get to bed at a reasonable hour, assuring you of the rest and quality sleep you need. TIVO any programs that you must see and watch them on the weekend.

Try this new itinerary for 1 week. You will be amazed at how much more productive and healthy you will feel and be. Your boss and other superiors will take notice as well. You will be positioned for vastly increased earnings, promotion and the recognition you now deserve. This new scenario begins with a change in attitude. Simply decide to do things differently and take action. Learn from others who have already made such decisions, duplicate their actions and enjoy the same results and benefits. This strategy will work for you too!

Copyright 2005 Daniel Sitter

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When Self-Growth becomes Self-Sabotage

Many of us invest quality time and energy into our personal development. We buy inspiring books, sometimes with the workbooks or journals that complement them. We discuss psychology with our friends – or we look for friends with whom we can have open discussions on the subject. There is activity in our mind – at times a little bit of confusion. We encounter so many different lines of thoughts, so many tools, so many exploratory exercises we can do. It’s as if we were in the middle of a dense, majestic forest…

Then, maybe it happened to you, you reach a point where you don’t feel satiated anymore after reading the hot new self-improvement book…The workshop just feels like another workshop… Philosophical discussions feel more like empty calories…It’s not that your head is full: it’s more that you are hungry. You are hungry, because you have tasted - sometimes chewed – the wisdom you have read or heard, but you haven’t digested and integrated it. Don’t we benefit from relaxing and taking a break after a good meal?

I think none of us have ever seen, written in the back of a book, “You don’t need to read me – all the wisdom is within you”. No publisher would be so open-minded (or masochist)… Besides, we are the ones who have to figure out for ourselves how we can best use the resources available to us – how we can use them to connect to our own inner wisdom, inspirations, intuitions. Other people’s insights are guiding lights. We don’t need a zillion guiding lights, in fact we get lost if we are surrounded by too many of them – they point in too many different directions. Their role is simply to show us possibilities, which we can consider… and once we have chosen something to be our truth, we close the book, we turn the light off, and we get in touch with our own inner guidance.

One simple concept can drastically change our life. It can be, “Love yourself ”, it can be, “Be all that you can be”, or “Fear is an illusion”... But none of these makes real sense, no concept will truly transform our life, if it’s not integrated in every cell of our body, if it doesn’t feel as tangible as if it came from us in the first place. We keep reading and listening to “teachers”, and “experts”; but who’s the best expert, when it comes to you, or when it comes to me?

I believe nothing in self-growth has to be hard and complex. You can sit in silence, you can look inside yourself with wide open eyes, and you will “see”, or feel, the precise wisdom you need at that exact moment. It’s not always exactly what we want to hear – in fact, often it’s not, so we refuse to accept it – but sometimes that’s what self-growth is about, that’s what we really need to bring ourselves to the next level. That being said, it’s easier sometimes to face a book, or another person, than it is to truly face and accept ourselves. And let’s acknowledge the fact that we often prefer complicated answers, and techniques.

“Self-sabotage” is a strong word… What I tried to convey with the provoking title is that, at some point, the energy we dedicate to self-growth resources may better serve us (in terms of self-growth) if we invest it elsewhere: in introspection… in basic down-to-earth actions… in meditations… or maybe in fun things…

Sometimes we have an endless to-do list that causes us major stress, and instead of simply doing what must be done, we will read a book on relaxation, do yoga, or else… Sometimes we are a little gloomy, we just need to loosen up, laugh, and have fun… but we will attend a workshop on a subject we think will provide us answers. Not that it won’t! Obviously, none of this is “bad” – sometimes it may even be the most constructive things to do… but what I’m highlight here is that sometimes, it’s may not. Finally, I guess my point is: “self-growth can be everything, you have access within yourself to all the wisdom there is, and you are magnificent beyond what you can imagine”.

by Marie-Pier Charron

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Discover Where Your Ego Dwells

Dealing with your ego is part of your spiritual growth. Use this spirituality information to understand where the ego hangs out so that you can gain more understanding about the ego and how to avoid its influence. Seek the influence of the ego's counter-balancing force, your sacred self.

I hate to be redundant, but I love Albert Einstein for being such an enlightened messenger and what he had to say about how influential our thoughts are. Remember this? “You can't get any revolutionary ideas by thinking the same thoughts that you have been thinking. You have to change the way you are thinking and think different thoughts.”

If it was important enough for Albert Einstein to think this way then, personally, that is good enough for me. In fact, changing my way of thinking and thinking different thoughts is how I got to a point in my life where I was able to sit down and write a book. Now that's a revolutionary idea, isn't it? Do you have a book inside you? Do you have a song in you that needs to get out and be heard? Do you have a passion in you that is trying to break through and reach the forefront of your thinking and desires?

Methinks that you do. There is a revolution that is going on inside you and you need to take some time to listen to yourself and nurture the voice that beckons you to reveal to yourself what you truly desire.

I am not speaking about what the talking heads on the television are telling you to desire. I am not speaking about what your parents told you to desire. I am not speaking about what Charlie, down at the neighborhood pub, told you to desire. I am speaking about what your inner guidance system is trying to reveal to you.

But let's not be mistaken here because there are two heads to this inner voice that is trying to break through. One voice belongs to your ego and the other voice belongs to your sacred self.

Remember how we live in a universe of relativity? Remember how we learned that everything in this physical universe is in relationship to everything else? Well, that inner voice inside our heads is no different than anything else in this world of relativity.

At one end of the spectrum is our ego and at the other end is our sacred self. The ego is tied to the philosophy that we are separate from each other, separate from all other things in the universe and separate from God. The sacred self is tied to the philosophy that we are all one with each other, one with all things in the universe and one with God. Our lives exist between the margins.

The ego is part of the human make-up and will be with us whenever we dwell in the realm of the physical and live within this concept we know of as time because the ego only exists in our past memories or our future imaginings. The ego cannot exist in the present moment of now. That is where the spirit dwells. When we return to the realm of the absolute, everything reverts back to the love that is the core of our being and the ego disappears because we are once again in full knowledge that we are one with the source of all that exists and there is no concept such as time. There is only the present moment of now and the ego cannot exist in this environment.

Right now we are living in this physical universe, ergo the ego is very much a part of our make-up, but we must also remember that the sacred self is just as much a part of our beingness as the ego. Unfortunately, we have been conditioned so much by our society to listen to, and take the advice of, our ego that we don't think about our sacred self too much.

The reason for this preponderance of ego-based thinking is that most people do not dwell in the present moment. We are conditioned to live in the past or the future. The more you are able to live in the present moment the more you will be able to lose the influence of the ego and listen to your sacred self, or spirit.

by Richard Blackstone

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How Do You Create You Own Luck? Five Practical Steps

Some of us may think that there are lucky or successful people and other who are unlucky or losers, they think that if you were loser then you have no luck and if you were successful then of course you must have luck in all your life matter.

But, what do we mean by luck?

Luck is only the chances law which move through your control over the circumstances, events and people around you. You can move it up or down, increase or decrease the probabilities of reaching the desired results.

As during a certain period either month, year or years, you have made a group of small assignments ( which we will call inputs) these inputs led at the end of this period to certain results ( we will call it outputs).

So there is no lucky person; only someone who achieve many tasks and missions and control over many circumstances, events and people, doing so can raise the possibility of achieving the desired results which was set in the first place.

But, what some may call luck ( like winning a big prize, inherit a wealthy relatives or even winning a horse gamble) is not luck at all, it is only a coincident or chances were the achieved results is not under your control and you have no influence on it, because it is too risky and your chances to win it on the long run is merely zero, despite the fact that luck depends on your inputs and is under your control in every ways.

Now you have to know how to make your own luck and how to control all the elements around you to raise the possibility of getting the results you want which some may call luck and I call consequences of your work. Also, you have to know how to make the possibilities law works for your benefit and not the opposite. Finally, you have to be free from randomly and uncertainty.

Here are five steps to do so:

1. You have to prepare a complete study to all the knowledge, skills and possibilities which you need to do a certain job ad apply this study by all means, therefore, you’ll raise the chances of your success in this job.
2. Be sure you can get whatever you want from life no matter how hard and difficult it is, just do everything possible to increase probabilities of getting it, no matter small what you do it may make a difference in future either by success or failure in getting what you want.
3. Organize your life, don’t live it hazard, put a plan for your life, a plan you will follow to raise probabilities of achieving your target. State your goals and how you will accomplish them, what is the events, things and people you will require to manage all parts of your life. Don’t leave anything to circumstances, use your full abilities and create your own life, as you are the one who make luck and you are the one who control it to your benefit or otherwise.
4. Follow the steps of successful people or what they call lucky people, do what they do to get the same results
5. Work what you love and choose from jobs what suits your abilities, skills and your natural talents, and don’t do tasks beyond your abilities hoping for better results. Always make the right inputs to get the desired results or the right outputs. Everyday, increase what you can achieve in the job you wish to be successful at, to get final outputs as consequences to your work and not a matter of chance or luck.

And always REMEMBER that God never waste the reward of your hard work.

Who work will find and who seed will harvest.

by Amany Mohamed

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15 Ways To Deal With Stress

Here comes the 15 tips to help you deal with stress.

1.Mind your words - Change words such as “I have to” to “I choose to.” Put yourself back in control and remove negative words such as “have to” will help you to reduce the pressure and stress level. Even the worst tasks seem better when we choose to do it instead of being forced into doing it.

2. Learn to say no - Taking up too many tasks and try to make yourself slog through a list that even superman will say no to just isn’t worth it. Learn to say no to tasks that can be done better by others and decline assisting in other tasks when you are occupied by tasks that you have not completed yet.

3. Look at the bright side - Don’t keep dwelling on how bad things are going to be. Look at the bright side of life. Dwelling in negativity will only sap your energy and demoralize you. Focus on the good things you can think of your tasks, like recognition or the sense of achievement when you completed your task.

4. Breathe deeply - Take a minute off from your work, close your eyes and breathe deeply. Do a few counts of deep breathing and see your stress level reduced almost immediately.

5. Take a walk - Get out of your chair and take a walk in a nearby garden or somewhere close to nature. Forget about your work for a moment and enjoy the nature.

6. Set realistic goals - Set goals that are able to stretch you but not enough to burn you up. Setting goals should be able to challenge you, just make sure you don’t pile unnecessary stress on yourself with unrealistic goals.

7. Ask for help - Delegate, outsource or ask a fellow colleague for help. 2 brains are better than 1 and 3 brains are better than 2. If you are running a business, it doesn’t make sense if you are running everything yourself. Outsource the non core tasks to others that have the specialize skills to do it even better than you.

8. Celebrate - Celebrate your mini milestones that you reached. Once you completed an important task, take a break from it and do a mini celebration and have a small reward for yourself. You will be more refreshed and motivated to do your next task.

9. Focus - Don’t multi task and try to do multiple things at the same time. It is unnecessary burden and most probably multi tasking doesn’t help in producing quality tasks.

10. Have a toy - Stress balls are manufactured for a reason. Yes, reducing stress! Put them at your work desk and play with them when you need it. Playing with it help to reduce anxiety and it is an excellent outlet to let go of negative energy that you had stored up. (I do not recommend this toy)

11. Sleep - Do not sacrifice sleep to churn out more work. What is worst than working with someone who is lacking in sleep and have a bad temper. Sacrificing sleep just aggravate your stress level. Get adequate shut eye and allow your body to work in optimal condition.

12. Exercise - Stop your work and do some exercises. It help to reduce your stress remarkably when you are exercising and it helps to move your focus off your work.

13. Don’t sweat the small stuff - Sometimes a little screw up is fine and we need do not need to be stressed over it. Just let it go and try to work it out.

14. Don’t be extreme - Don’t use words like “always” or “every time.”Extreme words will cause extreme reactions that do not help the situation and it just make the matter worst. “He screw it up every time” is an example of an extreme reaction. Slow down and think, did he really screw up every time? Probably no.

15. Laugh - Too stressed up in life? Catch a comedy and laugh your heart out. Can you look at the right and the left at the same time? That is the same as being stressful while laughing at the same time. So laugh more and allow your laughter to overcome stress.

When you are stressed up, just try to apply some of these tips to help bring down your stress level. Thanks for reading and have a good time relaxing!

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Various Quotes on Confidence

It may be difficult for you to keep focusing on the positive and the accomplishments in your life, especially when you are going through a particularly challenging obstacle. Here are 8 of my personal favorite quotes on self confidence, and the importance of it to our lives. Keep this quotes close on hand, or look for others that may inspire you further, for those moments when you need something to keep you motivated!

1. What you think of me is none of my business. What is most important is what I think of myself. -- Robert Kiyosaki

2. Luck has a peculiar habit of favoring those who do not depend on it. -- George Clason

3. Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up. -- Tomas Edison

4. Just as we can learn from our mistakes, we can gain character from our disappointments. -- Robert Kiyosaki

5. Don't go around saying the world owes you a living; the world owes you nothing; it was here first. -- Mark Twain

6. The self-confidence of a person multiplies their powers a hundredfold. -- Robert Collier

7. Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great ones make you feel that you, too, can become great. -- Mark Twain

8. Keep your thoughts positive, because thoughts become your words. Keep your words positive, because words become your behavior. Keep your behavior positive, because behavior becomes your habits. Keep your habits positive, because habits become your values. Keep your values positive, because values become your destiny. -- Mahatma Gandhi

by Greg Frost

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10 Anger management tips

So what is anger? Anger is a feeling, an emotional state when you feel annoyed or you can fly into rage. What actually caused it is when you are met with scenarios that you do not like or agree with.

Anger is a normal and healthy emotion of humans. It is only when anger gets out of control, it starts to affect your work, relationships and the quality of your life.

So what are the solutions to stop you from flying into a rage and do something or said something that you would later regret?

I will share 10 anger management tips with you.

1. One step back - Always take a step back from situations when you feel the area is hostile. When you are angry at someone you are talking to, take a step back to remind yourself to relax and be calm. Why stepping back help? By stepping back you leave the “hostile area” mentally and allow yourself space to cool down. When you are near somebody you are arguing with, you tend to have bigger reactions that may lead to fights. Will you stand in an area where bullets are flying?

2. Deep breathing - Take 3 deep breath and focus on the breath that you exhale through your mouth. Taking deep breaths help you to stay calm and sane.

3. TIE - TIE stands for take it easy. Keep repeating to yourself to take it easy and picture the words. It would be better to incorporate with deep breathing for better results.

4. Time Out! - Arguing with someone? Is the situation getting out of hand? Most probably both of you are not too calm and in the right mind to talk about anything. Ask for a time out, take whatever time off you feel that is appropriate and bring yourself to a level where you are calm and relax before you talk about anything.

5. Exercise - Go exert yourself. Jog, swim, hit the gym or whatever exercise that you prefer. Exercising allows you to release the stress and frustration that is locked in the body. Let the steam out to ease the pressure.

6. Anger log - Keep a book on recording your anger. Find out the patterns and triggers that lead you to feel angry. Once you identify the problem, you can then find a solution.

7. Pause button - Decide an action that will be your pause button. An example would be to imagine a button on your forehead. When you are angry, press the pause button and Stop! This action will allow you time to think and make a conscious decision.

8. Avoid extreme words - Avoid words such as “always” or “never” . “They are always finding fault with me” or “They never even help me once before”. These words are mostly not true and using this words can help to self convince you and cause the situation to worsen.

9. 10 funny counts - Forget about the old fashioned “count to 10 you are fine” talk. Use the 10 funny counts instead. When you are angry, just count( repeat after me ) “1 funny clown, 2 funny pig, 3 funny bananas, 4 funny red nose boss, 5 funny short giraffe… etc. Our brain works better with pictures, when you say something funny, you will tend to imagine it in the mind. Don’t believe me? Lets try. Don’t think of a pink elephant with black polka dots. What is in your mind?

10. Visualization - The theory behind this tip is the same as tip number 9. Visualize something funny you are angry at. Are you angry with your boss because he yelled at you for something that you didn’t do. Now look at him hard and come out with a big mental picture. Picture him fatter, balloon him up, put a pair of dorky spectacles on him, a big red nose and he kept falling over when he is yelling. Are you able to get angry at the new mental picture of your boss now? Hard to do, I believe.

by Vincent

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Bounce Back From These 3 Causes of Laziness

Everyone can get into a rut. What starts as one day where you don’t get much done, can turn into a week or two. Avoiding these streaks of laziness is the best solution, but what can you do when you’re stuck?

Getting Unstuck

The best way to get unstuck is to figure out how you got stuck in the first place. If you drive your car into a snowbank, the best way to get out is to get outside and look at the problem. But despite this suggestion, the first reaction is often to step on the gas, wasting more energy as you get even more stuck.

There are many ways you can get yourself into a streak of laziness. But I’ve found there are three big culprits that often cause you to get stuck, even though most people only blame one of them.

#1 - Low Energy

A common source of laziness is simply being drained. This is a silent cause of getting stuck, because human’s aren’t equipped with a fuel gauge. Until you’ve been running on empty for miles, it’s often hard to see that your procrastination is caused by a lack of fuel.

Whenever I’ve been stuck for more than a few days in a row, there are a few questions I try to ask myself to see whether a lack of energy is the problem:

• Have my eating or exercising habits changed in the last month? Even small changes can lead to an impact in your energy levels that you might not notice immediately.
• Have my sleeping patterns changed in the last month? Fewer hours of sleep or lower quality sleep can mean you start each day with less energy.
• Have other areas of my life added extra stress? Unfortunately, you’re only drawing fuel out of one tank, so if one area of your life is siphoning it away, you won’t have much left.

The solution to a low energy crisis is to fix whatever is the source of the drain. This isn’t always easy to do, but sometimes it is necessary. If you’re not getting enough sleep, you might need to set that as a priority before you try to drive out of your slump.

#2 - Forgotten Motivation

Why are you doing this again? Every project usually begins with inspiration. However, if you’re working the same tasks for months, some of the initial motivation for starting might be gone. Your big plans get replaced with smaller frustrations and it can be hard to find the motivation to keep going.

If there were good reasons to get started, there are probably good reasons to continue. Spending time to go through those reasons again can help you bring back your past motivation. If you’ve been stuck for more than a few days, this is a step that can’t be easily washed over. I’d suggest spending at least an hour or two going through your plans, long-term vision and initial motivation before you try to get unstuck.

Sometimes, however you’ll try to retrace your initial motivation and realize it’s not there. In this case, you stumble onto the third culprit for a slump.

#3 - It’s Not Worth It

You don’t like the work. You can’t see a long-term vision from the work. You can’t find a reason to be productive. This is a genuine reason to be in a slump. While a lack of energy or motivation can be a temporary road block, when you face this challenge, you truly are stuck.

When you reach this point, I think there are only two choices you can make in order to get unstuck:

• Quit.
• Keep going, but design your exit strategy.

The first solution is just to quit right there. I’ve done this before on project where the motivating reasons to continue couldn’t be found again. I’ve also done this with jobs that I had no motivating reasons to get started in the first place. Quitting isn’t a dishonorable move when staying means you’re draining your life away.

Unfortunately, quitting may not be so easy. Even if you can’t find an inspiring long-term vision connected to the work, you might be attached for short-term reasons. When this happens, many people try to ignore the long-term desert staying affords them and grudgingly accept what needs to be done.

I don’t think ignoring is an option. If you ignore your slump will only get worse. It may even get worse to the point that you can’t even continue your work for short-term reasons.

I think the only acceptable third-alternative is to continue for the short-term, but plan an exit strategy. If you’re in a career you don’t like, this might mean something drastic like getting new training on the side. If your crisis is smaller, it might mean finishing a project that drains you by planning a better project on the side.

If you can fit your current situation into your long-term vision via an exit strategy, you have a chance to get out of your slump. When I needed to take work I didn’t enjoy before I could support myself through a small business, I used my exit strategy as a means of motivating myself throughout the unenjoyable work.

I’ve listed the three major culprits of a slump in this order, because I think they are the order you need to check. Not every slump is a crisis that means you hate your work. It can be, but I’ve found being drained or temporarily losing your motivation can be equal enemies in a slump.

by Scott Young

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Why Unmaterialistic People Should Want to Get Rich

Imagine a greedy old miser, nearing the end of his life. For years he shunned friends and family to amass a fortune, but now, in old age, he sits alone in an empty mansion, cursing himself for missing out on the truly important things in life. No one wants to end up like him. We want to enjoy the love of our family and friends. Only materialistic people with skewed priorities care about being rich. Right?

The burden of acquiring money weighs heavily on anyone without it. People don’t go to work because they like it. They go because without money their families will have nowhere to live and nothing to eat. Without money you have no clothes, no food, no shelter, no life. For money we trade the bulk of our waking hours, 5 days a week, until old age renders us incapable.

Money isn’t everything, but it comes damn close. So with all these reasons to want money, why is the drive become rich associated with greed, selfishness, and materialism?

Why Money Arouses Greed and Resentment

What is the first image ‘rich man’ brings to mind? Think Disney, think Christmas, think Scrooge. Since before we could read we’ve been fed images of greedy misers abusing the helpless and kind hearted poor. Scrooge is only one instance of this popular archetype. Scan your mind for villains and you’ll find that ‘greedy rich man’ is the finest. Nothing inspires resentment better than someone with abundance who craves more, more, MORE.

But this isn’t reality. Real villains are few and far between and as likely to be poor as rich. Money is inherently neutral. The greed that inspires evil deeds originates not in money, but in the perpetrator. Money is as good or bad as the force that wields it.

In addition to media portrayals, there are more tangible reasons that richness inspires resentment. The greatest of these is the division of classes. While some people have relationships with both rich and poor, most don’t. You have your team and you stick to it. Even though most rich people are good folks, some are downright horrible. These spoiled brats (No one cares who your daddy is, and you’re making him look like a fool) create the resentment that spreads to all richness. The relationship between rich and poor is a toxic mixture of hatred and envy; people are forced to pick sides, and as Steve Olson explained, the outcome isn’t pretty.

There is also the wretched plague of materialism. The worst offenders aren’t the rich, but those who live beyond their means. The people going into debt to buy big houses, luxury cars, and plasma T.V.s. It isn’t about what you have, but what you can show. These fools want to be rich for shallow despicable reasons. Unmaterialistic people associate this idiocy with the desire to be rich and label the pursuit of the money unfulfilling. I was a member of this group of unmaterialists until I began to consider money and the nature of employment in a different light.

You Can Buy Time

The popular saying ‘you can’t buy time’ is blatantly false. Employers buy time everyday when they exchange money for labor. You may not be able to buy back time that has already passed, but you can certainly prevent yourself from having to sell your time in the future. Only the rich are able to avoid selling their time for money on a daily basis. Without the pressure to trade time for money, rich people are free to enjoy their lives however they please. If you take nothing else from this article, remember that money is freedom.

This realization led to the formation of my primary life goal: to become independently wealthy. By nature I am not a materialistic person. I care little for extravagance and the admiration of others. My favorite past times are the outdoors, basketball, reading, and collecting books. Old, used books, that generally cost less than a dollar, are more precious to me than any high tech gadgetry. But there is one valuable commodity that I prize above all others. Time.

When I started working full time 7 months ago I realized what it really meant to sell my time. I’m not complaining about my job. It pays well, affords decent hours, and the people are great. The problem is having to be there all the time. Call me ungrateful, but I don’t want just a good life, I want the best life I can muster, and that means having control of my own time.

Making Money Helps Other

After you buy something how do you usually feel? Unless you have spent foolishly and have buyer’s remorse you probably feel good. This is because have acquired something worth more to you than the money you paid for it. Commerce is an exchange of values. The merchant gets your money and you get wonderful commodities. Everyone is happy. If you weren’t happy you’d buy from someone else, which is why companies that don’t provide value go out of business. The success someone has is a direct indication of the value they provide to others.

Becoming rich doesn’t mean working long hours at a job you hate. Many people believe that becoming wealthy requires a high paying job i.e. doctor, lawyer, banker, executive etc. This may be the most certain path, but it isn’t the only one. There are unlimited ways to provide value to others, and the more creative ones are the most explosively successful. Don’t resign yourself to being poor just because these professions don’t fit. If you don’t like something you will never be great at doing it. The key is finding something you love that provides value to others.

You are currently witnessing my first foray into the world of independent value creation. I don’t expect this site to make me rich overnight, but it’s my first attempt at using my passions and abilities to create value. You may say I’m an optimistic fool, but each minute I work on this site I learn more about business and sharpen my creative abilities. Plus, it’s also very fun!

If you want to make the most of your life and attain personal freedom, becoming rich is a goal we both share. Don’t resign yourself to trading time for money just because that’s what most people do. Don’t wait to get going. Start working now. It’s going to be hard and you will need to make sacrifices, but don’t be discouraged. You have everything to gain, all you have to lose is your time.

by John Wesley

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Stop Waiting and Choose Your Own Talent

Men often become what they believe themselves to be. If I believe I cannot do something, it makes me incapable of doing it. But when I believe I can, then I acquire the ability to do it even if I didn’t have it in the beginning. -Gandhi

We are often held back by common misperceptions about the nature of talent and ability. We are taught that talent is a natural gift; that we have no more control over our talents than the color of our eyes. For many years I waited for my talent to manifest itself so I could reach my potential. Eventually I realized that waiting is useless, that talent is a choice not a gift, and that passion is stronger than any God given ability.

The primary source of confusion is equating talent with natural ability. By making this mistake we discourage ourselves from pursuing what we want. If we aren’t blessed with natural ability then trying seems pointless. But talent is much more than natural ability. Natural ability will get you in the door but not much further. For example, there are thousands of people with great athleticism, but there is only one Michael Jordan. Jordan became the best because he loved basketball to the point of obsession. The true source of his greatness is not natural ability but love.

Love is what motivates people to endure the hours of practice and countless failures that develop skill. Natural ability is insignificant compared to years of hard work and experience. If you really love something, don’t be discouraged by a lack of natural ability. Just work hard to improve, study your trade, learn from experience, and before long you’ll surpass those relying on natural ability alone.

The point I’m trying to make is that love, passion, desire, whatever you call it, is much more important to success than having a natural aptitude. We shouldn’t rely on our natural abilites to guide our lives. For a long time I expected my natural ability to expose itself and put me on the path to success. I assumed I’d come across it by accident and everything would fall into place. I guess I didn’t want to choose or didn’t know how to choose what I really wanted.

Long story short, this passive strategy didn’t work. If you wait for the world to find a place for you, you will be put in a group that really doesn’t fit. You lose your individuality. The truth is the world doesn’t care about finding your passion or reaching your potential. The world sees you as a means of production to be used as efficiently as possible. It is our personal responsibility to pursue our own happiness.

The beauty of it all, is that the key to success and the key to happiness are one and the same. The same love that makes you want to dedicate your life to something also motivates you to practice and develop your skills. So stop waiting for your greatness to appear out of thin air. Decide what you really love and start pursuing it today. No one else is going to do it for you.

by John Wesley

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What Would You Do With Five Years?

“For the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: ‘If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?’ And whenever the answer has been ‘No’ for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.” - Steve Jobs, in Commencement Address to Stanford students.

What would you do if you were told you had five years left to live? I prefer to use this rather than Steve Job’s single day, because most of us, with a day or week left, would spend them seeing family and saying goodbyes.

But five years is different. Five years is long enough to accomplish almost any goal you might have, however ambitious. And you wouldn’t want to spend five years partying hedonistically, or eating your favourite meal every night.

Would you finally get around to writing that novel that you’ve been planning for more years than you want to admit? Would you quit your job and set up your own business – secure in the knowledge that your retirement fund is no longer a problem? Would you find the means and the money to travel to places you’ve always wanted to visit?

Don’t Put Your Life On Hold

I live in London, where people my age (twenty-four) often say something like this:

"If I work 50 or 60 hour weeks for the next twenty years, I’ll eventually reach the top … then I’ll be able to retire early and do exactly what I want."

But why wait most of your life to be allowed to enjoy yourself – especially when you’re likely to have worked yourself to a breakdown or burnout long before then?

If you’re living for the future, working in a job you hate because you think it’ll benefit you in 30 or 40 years, think about your answer to what you’d do if you only had five years left. What’s stopping you going for it now? Are you really stuck – or just lacking the courage to move on?

Don’t Follow the Herd

When I graduated from university, I took the path that I thought was “expected” of people my age. I found a job as quickly as possible, moved to London, began renting from a landlord for the first time (I’d lived with my parents and then in college halls). After a month I was asking myself “Is this it?”

I stuck with that job – a dead-end from my point of view, as it was in a company and career I had no interest in staying with long-term – for almost two years. Then I managed to take the plunge into doing what I love for a living: writing and helping out small business owners with their websites. The hardest thing about doing this was going against the flow – explaining to people whose attitude was “Of course work sucks, that’s life” that it didn’t have to be that way.

Make Every Year Count

The good news is, I hope, that you don’t only have five years left. You might have twenty, forty or sixty years ahead of you. Make each of them count.

So what would you do with your five years? What’s that big project you’ve been dreaming about for years, or that idea you’ve only half formed?

by Ali Hale

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What Does It Mean To Live A Balanced Life?

Balance is something that is often mentioned in personal development and well-being circles. It is said you should eat a balanced diet, live a balanced life and seek a good work/family balance. But what is balance? What does it mean to live a balanced life and why does balance seem like such an elusive concept?

“It is said an Eastern monarch once charged his wise men to invent him a sentence to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and situations. They presented him the words: And this, too, shall pass away.” - Abraham Lincoln

Life really is one thing after another. The physical environment we each live in is in constant streaming flux. Physically when it’s cold we shiver to bring our body temperature up. When it’s hot we sweat to bring our body temperature down. As living organisms we live in a constantly changing environment. Our bodies are well adapted to this state of affairs and respond appropriately when conditions deviate from their optimal state. This ability of an organism to maintain equilibrium (balance) by adjusting appropriately to the external environment is known as homeostasis.

And there in lies the key to understanding balance. Balance is the taking of appropriate action when circumstances dictate so as to maintain equilibrium. It is said that the great achievement of the sages of old was the achievement of great balance as human beings. How did they achieve great balance? In the present moment, when things would come up, they would respond accordingly.

“There is no secret to balance. You just have to feel the waves.” - Frank Herbert

When it comes to a concept or principle such as balance it is important to understand that between different people and even from moment to moment the locus of balance is always going to be different. For example, what constitutes a balanced diet for one person may be completely different for another. Both diets may be very healthy in their own right but it is the context of the individual that makes them so. This is probably the key reason for so much disagreement and confusion in the field of nutrition. There is no one size fits all. No mass-producible solution. A difficult business model indeed and so another diet book comes off the press and another wonder product hits the shelves.

“Food is an important part of a balanced diet.” - Fran Lebowitz

Finding a sense of balance and harmony at some point in any aspect of life will soon turn to disharmony and loss of balance if you try to hold on and freeze that moment forever. Such action is futile and will only lead to pain and your own suffering. The only constant is change. The waves come in, break and recede. Then they roll on in again. Instead of fighting and being tumbled painfully ashore, feel the waves coming and ride them out.

“Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance and order and rhythm and harmony.” - Thomas Merton

by Stephen Cox

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Top 5 Ways to Build a Wonderful Life

1. Live Below Your Means

There will always be temptation to forsake the future for immediate gratification. We all want to buy that new piece of technology, treat ourselves to an expensive night on the town, or take out a loan for the flashy car we can’t afford. It might feel great at the time but rash spending hurts a lot later on.

Enjoy life’s simple pleasures and save as much as you can. Expensive things don’t create lasting happiness and security. Careful spending will bring you greater leisure and enjoyment in the long run.

2. Put Your Money to Work

Saving is great, but to make the most of your money you need to put it to work. Good investments can be the difference between retiring in your 40’s or in your 60’s.

A post today at The Simple Dollar really got me thinking. According to Trent’s projections, if a person in their early 20’s invests 20% of their income in an S&P index fund, the interest they earn will equal their current salary when they reach their early 40’s. They could retire without a drop in income!

Wise investing is the surest path to financial independence and it’s something everyone can work on. It’s definitely an area I’ll be devoting more attention to in my personal life and on this blog.

3. Educate Yourself

To be happy we need continuous growth. The best way to grow is life long education. This doesn’t mean you need to pursue a doctorate or spend 2 hours reading every day. Self education can be anything that takes you out of your comfort zone. The important part is keeping an open mind and searching for fresh ideas and perspectives.

Education builds over time. It might feel like the bits of wisdom you acquire don’t mean much, but over the years they add up to form a wiser, kinder, more interesting person.

4. Develop Lasting Personal Relationships

Suppose you had everything you wanted. Would you be happy without anyone to share it with? The personal relationships we develop with friends and family members are the greatest source of happiness in our lives. Don’t forget about them.

Taking the time to cultivate and enjoy personal relationships is essential to longterm happiness. Without the people you care about you’ll probably be miserable, no matter how successful you become.

5. Work Towards a Dream You’re Passionate About

Even if your life isn’t perfect, you can always build towards a goal you’re passionate about. If you aren’t building towards something, you’re probably stagnating. When this happens to me I start to feel like a victim trapped by my own life. The best way to reverse this is working towards a goal.

We can’t control everything about our lives, but working towards a goal gives us something positive to focus on and lays the foundation for future success. No matter what your passion is, get out there and start doing something. As Lao Tzu said, even a journey of 1,000 miles begins with a single step.

Bonus: 6. Stay in Shape

You only get one body. Once it’s been ruined there isn’t much you can do about it. Exercise to keep the rust off. Avoid excessive consumption of damaging substances and unhealthy foods. It may feel like terrible self denial at the time but enjoying good health in your later years is worth the sacrifice.

by John Wesley

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Increase Motivation

If you want to make things happen the ability to motivate yourself and others is a crucial skill. At work, home, and everywhere in between, people use motivation to get results. Motivation requires a delicate balance of communication, structure, and incentives. These 21 tactics will help you maximize motivation in yourself and others.
Motivation

1. Consequences - Never use threats. They’ll turn people against you. But making people aware of the negative consequences of not getting results (for everyone involved) can have a big impact. This one is also big for self motivation. If you don’t get your act together, will you ever get what you want?

2. Pleasure - This is the old carrot on a stick technique. Providing pleasurable rewards creates eager and productive people.

3. Performance incentives - Appeal to people’s selfish nature. Give them the opportunity to earn more for themselves by earning more for you.

4. Detailed instructions - If you want a specific result, give specific instructions. People work better when they know exactly what’s expected.


5. Short and long term goals - Use both short and long term goals to guide the action process and create an overall philosophy.

6. Kindness - Get people on your side and they’ll want to help you. Piss them off and they’ll do everything they can to screw you over.

7. Deadlines - Many people are most productive right before a big deadline. They also have a hard time focusing until that deadline is looming overhead. Use this to your advantage by setting up a series of mini-deadlines building up to an end result.

8. Team Spirit - Create an environment of camaraderie. People work more effectively when they feel like part of team — they don’t want to let others down.

9. Recognize achievement - Make a point to recognize achievements one-on-one and also in group settings. People like to see that their work isn’t being ignored.

10. Personal stake - Think about the personal stake of others. What do they need? By understanding this you’ll be able to keep people happy and productive.

11. Concentrate on outcomes - No one likes to work with someone standing over their shoulder. Focus on outcomes — make it clear what you want and cut people loose to get it done on their own.

12. Trust and Respect - Give people the trust and respect they deserve and they’ll respond to requests much more favorably.

13. Create challenges - People are happy when they’re progressing towards a goal. Give them the opportunity to face new and difficult problems and they’ll be more enthusiastic.

14. Let people be creative - Don’t expect everyone to do things your way. Allowing people to be creative creates a more optimistic environment and can lead to awesome new ideas.

15. Constructive criticism - Often people don’t realize what they’re doing wrong. Let them know. Most people want to improve and will make an effort once they know how to do it.

16. Demand improvement - Don’t let people stagnate. Each time someone advances raise the bar a little higher (especially for yourself).

17. Make it fun - Work is most enjoyable when it doesn’t feel like work at all. Let people have fun and the positive environment will lead to better results.

18. Create opportunities - Give people the opportunity to advance. Let them know that hard work will pay off.

19. Communication - Keep the communication channels open. By being aware of potential problems you can fix them before a serious dispute arises.

20. Make it stimulating - Mix it up. Don’t ask people to do the same boring tasks all the time. A stimulating environment creates enthusiasm and the opportunity for “big picture” thinking.

Master these key points and you’ll increase motivation with a bit of hard work.

by John Wesley

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How to Master the Art of Forgiveness

Many people find it hard to forgive. As we go through life, it’s inevitable that we’ll come across people who wrong us in one way or another. From the one who cuts you off in traffic to the one who puts you on hold and forgets about you, there’s no shortage of people out there who aren’t treating us exactly the way we’d like. Unfortunately, we’re rather limited in our ability to influence their behavior. But the good news is that we have a lot of control over how we react to them.

Why forgive?

First of all, keep in mind that it’s generally in your best interest to forgive people. Choosing to carry a grudge forever keeps you from ever repairing the relationship. Long after you’ve forgotten what the other person actually did, you’re still focused on being mad at them because you’re stuck in that habit. It’s very easy to blow something way out of proportion because you think too much about what went wrong instead of how to make it right. Don’t be too attached to your anger.

Another thing to consider is what you accomplish by not forgiving. You might decide never to forgive Hitler, and I can’t really object to that. In that case, many people would consider forgiveness to mean compromising their integrity. But what about someone who just made a rude comment about you? Do you really need to be mad at them forever? Is it really worth the stress and the higher blood pressure, or can you just let it go? Just because you might be justified in being mad, doesn’t mean it’s your best option.

Forgiving others

To be able to forgive others, it’s helpful to understand where they’re coming from. Sometimes we make assumptions that someone must be a jerk to act a certain way, when there might be factors we aren’t considering.

The person who cut you off in traffic? Maybe they were racing to the hospital. Maybe they were late to an interview for a job that they really need. Maybe they swerved to avoid someone else.

The person who put you on hold and forgot about you? Maybe they were severely understaffed because some people were sick that day. Maybe they were trying to track down the perfect person to solve your problem. Maybe their phone system malfunctioned and you got transferred to the wrong place.

The person at the store who gave you bad service? Maybe it was their first day. Maybe they hadn’t been trained properly. Maybe they had a bad experience with the previous customer that had them frazzled.

In many cases, the person who wronged you might have acted completely out of character for some reason, and they might truly be sorry. It’s also possible that they don’t even know they did anything wrong! Try not to make assumptions, and just talk to them instead. Say what they did, why you think it was wrong, and how it made you feel. If they didn’t mean for it to be an act of vengeance, then why not forgive them?

Forgiving yourself

Sometimes the hardest person to forgive is yourself. If someone else makes a mistake, we’re more objective about it, and we can see that they really did the best they could. If we make the same mistake, it’s a lot harder to be objective. We think back over all the details and see how many things we could have done differently. Other people might say it’s OK, but how do you appease your own toughest critic?

As with other people, you need to consider what you have to gain by not forgiving yourself. Usually it’s very little. If you can make the situation right, do it. Otherwise, work on doing better next time. If necessary, avoid similar situations until you’re sure you can handle them better. But don’t wallow in guilt. It’s one of the most useless emotions of all.

Is there anyone you need to forgive today?

by Hunter Nuttall

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Over 40? The 10 steps to FINALLY doing the work that’s JUST right for you

1. P is for Perfect: Purpose

What is life about? How will you make a difference in the world? Your purpose drives your behavior and can provide you with daily energy and happiness. What is the purpose of your life? Think deeply about where you most want to make a contribution in the world.

Does making people laugh give you purpose? How about making food for others? Maybe it’s helping others become physically fit. Perhaps it’s helping supply a service that helps people stay organized. Your purpose is personal. No one will really care except the most important person in the world — YOU. Having a purpose will change your life and give you the direction you are looking for.

2. P is for Perfect: Prize

What is most important to you? What behaviors would you have to follow each day to be true to yourself? What would you have to do each day to NOT follow what is most important to you? The choice is yours.

Look at your daily activities. Are you spending your time on what is most important to you? Does your work align with what is most important to you? Is your work a natural alignment of your abilities and your interests?

Living life through others and their values will leave you feeling out of control and stagnant. Living life through what YOU prize most will give your life meaning, and give you a feeling of fulfillment.

3. P is for Perfect: Perspective

Others have views about you. What’s more important is the perspective you have of yourself.

You can change perceptions that aren’t useful to you any longer. What is your perspective of the world?

How do you feel about you? Where do these feelings come from? Could you replace these feelings with new ideas that are most useful right now?

What we focus on is what we get. If you continually think about what is not working, you will only attract more of this into your life. Instead, focus on what you want with regards to your work. Find others who are doing exactly what you want to do. Talk to them; study them. If they can do it, so can you.

4. P is for Perfect: Possibilities

What is possible for you in your vocational life? So many of us focus, instead, on what’s impossible. What would you have to do to start believing more things are possible for you?

Possibilities start with you. If you really think something you want is not possible, then you will not move towards it. On the other hand, start to believe what you want IS possible, and you will find new energy to move towards what you want.

Give yourself proof that what you want is possible and real. The mind can’t tell the difference between what’s real and what’s imagined, when thinking about the future.

Make sure what you focus on is what is right for you.

5. P is for Perfect: Place

What is your role in the world? In your heart, what is the vision you have for yourself? What are your abilities and your interests? Do they match?

Is your current job something you could really do for the rest of your life?

If not, you must change. The only people who retire, are people who don’t love what they do. Most people dream of retirement, and then when they get there, they are bored and depressed, and they die not too many years after.

The solution?

Find work now that you can enjoy doing until you stop breathing. Many financial experts now will help you make a financial plan that covers 100 years. That’s a lot of years, and if you are between 40 and 50, that’s nearly half your life to go!

Time for a change if your work no longer serves you.

6. P is for Perfect: Position

What is your attitude on a daily basis? What would you like to change, and why? What small steps could you take now to “try on” a new daily position?

Does your work bring a smile to your face each day?

Do you want to pinch yourself because you can’t believe you actually make a living doing what you love? If this is NOT true for you, it’s time for change!

Yes, you can decide to have a good attitude at a lousy job for a while. But you are only fooling yourself, and it will not last long.

7. P is for Perfect: Passion

What are you really passionate about? Can you identify the vocational patterns in your passions? Don’t let negativity defeat your creativity.

What do you most often think about — what gets you excited with regards to your work?

What type of work makes you happy, alive, and full of energy?

8. P is for Perfect: Perfect Vocational Day

Do you have a vision of your perfect day — can you imagine living your dream while making the income you require at the same time? If you can’t imagine it, you can’t move towards it.

Write down exactly what would be just perfect for you with regards to an average work day doing something that could last a lifetime. Why not? Most jobs were not developed for you.

Most job searching is backwards. Instead of trying to fit yourself into a job, start with exactly what the pattern of your perfect day would be; a daily plan that works best for you. This will lead you to the right work. You won’t need Human Resources for this!

9. P is for Perfect: Present

What are you doing in the present to move towards your perfect vocational day? Do you know the gap between your dreams, and where you are now? Do you know the real reason why reaching your perfect vocational day is so important to you?

Do you have the right relationships now to support your journey?

Do you have the right people in your life to support you and fuel your journey?

Write a future biography that describes what you want your life to be like in 2-3 years. You are not done until this vision fits you perfectly.

10. P is for Perfect: Putting it all together (Giving yourself permission)

Have you defined and written down exactly what you want? Have you talked about it with others?

If you follow your heart, you will become a magnet for your dreams.

Look for those defining moments in your life — the times when you find yourself saying “enough is enough!”

Maybe it will be something big like a divorce, illness, layoff, or a financial crisis. Maybe it will simply be a realization that these faceless bosses, meetings, and paperwork are getting in the way of an authentic life. Most jobs would not be done if people were not paid to do them.

Only you can find and do the work that matters most to YOU.

I think this might be JUST the right time for you to get started!

I’ll be cheering you on as you go.

by: Craig Nathason

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Overcoming a Loss of Motivation

How many times have you started a new activity (such as a personal project or exercise routine) with a burst of enthusiasm, only to see that initial momentum evaporate? This often leads to depression and causes us to give up prematurely. I’ve experienced this letdown dozens of times myself. But fortunately, with a bit of thought and reflection you can turn this negative emotion around.

The key to harnessing your emotions is understanding them. The natural pattern of human emotion is peaks and valleys. When we start a new project we’re filled with tremendous optimism. All we can think about is the expected benefits, and since we haven’t started yet, we aren’t aware of the difficulties involved. This natural high causes a surge of mental and physical activity. The peak is a great thing because the energy boost gets projects off the ground. If you’re a creative type like me, you know that this period is euphoric. You feel like nothing can stop you.

The downside of this surge of energy is that it inevitably ends. Exerting large amounts of energy wears you down, and after the initial optimism wears off we feel extremely tired. However high you started off, you fall down just as low. This causes a loss of confidence. The combination of fatigue, scant results, and an awareness of impending adversity makes us want to give up. From personal experience I’ve learned a few ways to hold strong against negativity.
Be Prepared for a Letdown

Emotions, by nature, lose their power when we understand them. Prove this to yourself. Next time you get angry, take a moment to reflect on the reason behind the emotion. When I step back and reflect, it’s easy to see that my anger is caused by insecurity/selfishness/jealousy etc. After I understand the cause my anger fades away.

The same technique applies to a loss of motivation. Instead of giving into negativity, step back and analyze. Look at the causes. Are you tired, burned out, disappointed by the results? Are these feelings justified, or are they a by product of a low point in the emotional spectrum?

To illustrate these ideas, I’ll use my most recent project as an example, the creation of this site. When I launched Pick the Brain it took an enormous amount of effort. I was completely new to blogging, web design, and traffic building so there was a steep learning curve. Writing new posts, setting up the site, and trying to build traffic took up nearly all my free time. After about three weeks I was completely burned out. I got depressed and started to question if the site was worth the effort. I wasn’t seeing any returns and I started to find enormous faults in my writing and the purpose of the site. There were moments when I was resigned to failure.

One reason I was able to overcome this loss of motivation is that I prepared myself for a letdown. Beforehand, I researched blogging and learned that it generally takes 9-12 months before a site begins to see significant traffic. Knowing that my lack of success was perfectly normal helped me get over it. The same is true for other endeavors. If you know losing 20 pounds in a month is unrealistic, you’ll be able to accept losing only 5 more easily.

I also knew my own emotions and was prepared for the initial emotional peak to pass. When I was first inspired to launch a website, my expectations were through the roof. Dreams of AdSense revenue danced in my head and I pictured throngs of loyal readers as if they already existed. But because I understand my emotional pattern, I realized this optimism would give way to depression. In the back of my mind, I foresaw the impending motivational battle, and when it came I was ready.

Reevaluate Your Strategy and Motivation

The passing of the emotional peak is a blessing in disguise because it allows us to reevaluate our plans from a fresh perspective. At first we are blinded by our own optimism. When we lose our motivation we can see gaping holes our in plan. We can either get down on ourselves and give up, or we can use this negative emotion to discover our faults and correct them. After I pulled myself out of the motivational cellar, I went back to all the negatives thoughts I’d had and applied them to improving the site. Having a pessimistic attitude opened my eyes. It made me realistic about my abilities and expectations. Emotional valleys bring us back to reality. Without them we’d be raving lunatics with unlimited self-confidence.

Use a loss of motivation as an opportunity to reconsider what your motivation really is. One reason I lost motivation is that I became too concerned with the financial aspect of blogging and lost sight of the real reason I started: sharing my passion for self improvement and the pursuit of happiness. When I realigned my motivation with my passion, the lack of results didn’t matter. My motivation returned because I realized connecting with people through my writing is an end in itself. Even if this site never makes I dime, sharing my ideas and experiences to help other people is worth the effort.

In truth, sometimes giving up is the right decision. If you started doing something for the wrong reasons you’ll likely lose your motivation. This is a good thing. It allows us to see what really motivates us. In these cases, the best choice is to move on to a new endeavor. Don’t fight self doubt, use it for your benefit.

Conclusion

Dealing with emotional highs and lows is an experience common to all people. We generally accept our emotions as beyond our control. They are powerful and mysterious and appear quite irrational. But if we contemplate our emotions, if we explore the inner workings of our minds, we find that like all things, emotions obey the law of cause and effect. Armed with this knowledge, we can continue to allow our emotions to dominate our lives, or we can use them to our benefit.

Don’t be surprised by a loss of motivation and don’t be disappointed by it. Understand it as natural effect of the human mind, and utilize this knowledge of self to make your emotions work for you.

by John Wesley

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How to Achieve Your Goals with Healthy Habits

We’ve all faced the disappointment and guilt that comes from setting a goal and giving up on it after a couple of weeks. Sustaining motivation for a long-term goal is hard to achieve, and yet the best goals can usually only be accomplished in a few months or even years.

Here’s the solution: Focus instead on creating a new habit that will lead to achieving your goal.

Want to run a marathon? First create the habit of running every day. Want to get out of debt and start saving? Create the habit of brown bagging it to work, or watching DVDs instead of going to the movies, or whatever change will lead to saving money for you.

By focusing not on what you have to achieve over the course of the next year, but instead on what you are doing each day, you are focusing on something achievable. That little daily change will add up to a huge change, over time … and you’ll be surprised at how far you’ve come in no time. Little grains of sand can add up to a mountain over time.

I used this philosophy of habit changes to run a marathon, to change my diet and lose weight, to write a novel, to quit smoking, to become organized and productive, to double my income, reduce my debt and start saving, and to begin training for an Olympic triathlon this year. It works, if you focus on changing habits.

Now, changing your habits isn’t easy — I won’t lie to you — but it’s achievable, especially if you start small. Don’t try to change the world with your first habit change … take baby steps at first. I started by just trying to run a mile — and by the end of the year, I could run more than 20 miles.

How do you change your habits? Focus on one habit at a time, and follow these steps:

1. Positive changes. If you’re trying to change a negative habit (quit smoking), replace it with a positive habit (running for stress relief, for example).
2. Take on a 30-day challenge. Tell yourself that you’re going to do this habit every day, at the same time every day, for 30 straight days without fail. Once you’re past that 30-day mark, the habit will become much easier. If you fail, do not beat yourself up. Start again on a new 30-day challenge. Practice until you succeed.
3. Commit yourself completely. Don’t just tell yourself that you might or should do this. Tell the world that DEFINITELY will do this. Put yourself into this 100 percent. Tell everyone you know. Email them. Put it on your blog. Post it up at your home and work place. This positive public pressure will help motivate you.
4. Set up rewards. It’s best to reward yourself often the first week, and then reward yourself every week for that first month. Make sure these are good rewards, that will help motivate you to stay on track.
5. Plan to beat your urges. It’s best to start out by monitoring your urges, so you become more aware of them. Track them for a couple days, putting a tally mark in a small notebook every time you get an urge. Write out a plan, before you get the urges, with strategies to beat them. We all have urges to quit — how will you overcome it? What helps me most are deep breathing and drinking water. You can get through an urge — it will pass.
6. Track and report your progress. Keep a log or journal or chart so that you can see your progress over time. I used a running log for my marathon training, and a quit meter when I quit smoking. It’s very motivating to see how far you’ve come. Also, if you can join an online group and report your progress each day, or email family and friends on your progress, that will help motivate you.

Most important of all: Always stay positive. I learned the habit of monitoring my thoughts, and if I saw any negative thoughts (”I want to stop!”) I would squash it like a little bug, and replace it with a positive thought (”I can do this!”). It works amazingly. This is the best tip ever. If you think negative thoughts, you will definitely fail. But if you always think positive, you will definitely succeed.

by Leo Babauta

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Using Your Motivational Skills to Develop a Team

When you are given a situation that evolves a group of people you will find that not only will you have to learn how to work as a team, but motivate each other to work as a team. There are so many things that you are going to have to do in order to get the group to come together, but all a team needs is some direction and leadership.

One of the best ways that you can motivate a team is by coming to the team and being a great listener and communicator. You will also want tot come to the group with good leadership skills. Leaderships skills is hard to obtain, however, you can always learn how to become a great leader by taking some classes, as well as, seminars. When you come to the group as a leader you will find out that everyone will appreciate the direction and come together.

The other thing that you might want to keep in mind is being able to come to a group with leadership, but not dictatorship. You don't want to seem the boss of the group, however, if you keep the communication channel open, there is no reason why you cannot suggest some ideas of your own.

If you notice that the group has gone off track from a task, you can always bring the group back through various motivational tasks. Some of these things could be like taking a quick break, reviewing the meeting, and even asking the others to come up with a solution to the group.

You will also want to come up with task-orientated activities so that you can always have the group motivated and ready for the tasks at hand. You will also find that if you look up some task orientated activities then you will be able to control the direction of the group and keep the communication open.

The activities that you can do will vary and you can find plenty of ideas online or from higher ranking co-workers. You will find that you can even make up your own activities because it depends on the type of people that you are working with and the type of team that you are apart.

If you really want to motivate someone, you have to find it inside yourself to get the team to reason with you and to get the motivation it takes to stay focus. You will find that if you are good leader you will not have so many issues with team motivation, however you should always be thinking about the communication channels, and how you can communicate better within the team. You will find that communication skills are vital for you to be able to motivate anyone.

It is very important that you learn how to motivate or lead a team, because there are many life lessons in being part of team. You'll learn even more lessons if you are in a group that can function as one. You will find that it is very important as a leader for you to be able to communicate clearly and by being in several teams you'll get the practice and training of how to be a leader. Being a leader is a great honor and you might just want to take it all in with a positive attitude. Remember, when you are a positive leader then you will be a part of a positive team. What you bring in the team is what you have to survive as a team. If you do not give it the time and energy needed to find out how to motivate anyone then the team will fail.

About the Author

Carl Hoffman has over 20 years of sales and marketing experience and is considered an expert cook. he has many online ventures and author of countless articles on cooking, health, sales and marketing. You can visit him at Hoffy's Kitchen.

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