How to Recession Proof Your Job: Ten Job Secrets for Career Success!

Economic times constantly change and organizations adapt to these changes. For you to find career success, you must be pro-active about your job. What are the career secrets of those who soar to the top in their careers no matter what the economic environment is in the world?

The following are ten career secrets you can use to “recession proof” yourself and find career success no matter what the economic situation is:

1. Find Out What Your Organization Needs for Career Success

Invest the time to investigate and understand your organization’s mission, goals, and values. Your organization may be facing challenges and the person who can tune into what the organization needs to be successful and provide the solution can write his/her own career success ticket.

Remember, to get what you want in your career, you must help your organization, your department, your manager succeed. Focus on what is important to your manager and provide the solution. If customer service is important, speak with your manager in terms of creating customer solutions. If your manager is a numbers person, quantify all your results, etc.

2. Be a Change Agent for Career Success

Organizational change will change the way you do your job. There is no escaping the changes that are happening around us all the time. Learn to embrace these changes so that you can learn how to take advantage of the career opportunities available from being a change agent.

How do you do this? Be pro-active and ask questions about the change. How does it affect the organization? What challenges will there be implementing the changes? How will these changes affect the way you do your job? And the most important question, “What can you do to help implement the changes?”

Once you receive the answers to these questions, and are able to act on the answers, you are way ahead of the “change curve” and will be looked at as someone who can “make things happen” within the organization. This will lead to countless career opportunities

3. Be the Master of Your Job for Career Success

Invest the time to learn as much as there is to know about your job. Many times, employees will become complacent and master only the few tasks that they do 80% of the time. Then when a career opportunity comes up, this employee doesn’t have the skill set to take advantage of a promotion or raise.

Take the time to read trade journals, go on the Internet to job related sites, and ask questions to master the understanding of your job. With the wealth of information there is in the 21st century, there is no excuse for “not knowing.”

4. Volunteer to Make a Difference for Career Success

Volunteer for assignments that expose your skills. Look for especially challenging projects that other people have declined.

Also volunteer to mentor others within your organization. This will show and develop your leadership, management, and interpersonal skills. Keep management posted on your challenges and how you are working with the person you are mentoring to overcome these challenges.

Volunteer to write a department or organizational newsletter. This is another way to benefit a large group, while showcasing your skills and ideas.

5. Be a Solution Creator and Not a Problem Maker for Career Success

Anybody can find problems within organizations. My experience is that you don’t need to find them…they will find you. Some people have a special skill for finding problems and reporting them.

Develop the skill of looking at these problems as “opportunities for advancement,” step back and analyze the opportunity, and develop ideas for overcoming the problem. Make sure you communicate these solutions during meetings, e-mails, memos, and conversations with management. You will soon be looked upon by management as someone who can overcome obstacles and make things happen within the organization.

6. Handle the Next Level at This Level for Career Success

If you are a manager and want to become a vice president, then start working like a vice president. Find a vice president that is open to mentoring you for the next level. Remember, that vice president will not be promoted to the next level unless the organization sees that the vice president has developed someone to take his/her spot. It might as well be you. Plus, you can lighten the vice president’s work load.

Explain to the vice president what you want to accomplish so that everyone has a clear understanding and that this is a win-win situation for all involved.

I hear, “I’m too busy already to do this.” Well, let me ask you, “How badly do you want the promotion?” We are all busy. It’s up to you to enhance your time management and delegation skills so that you can take on these tasks that will prepare you for the next job level.

Note: Dress as if you are already at the next career level. When you dress for the next level, this makes it easier for the decision makers because they can already envision you at the next career level.

7. Announce That You Want It!

Many times employees miss out on promotions because the decision makers and career influencers do not know they are interested in being promoted.

Announce that you want to go to the next career level!

Take time to sit down with your supervisor, manager, director, etc., and let them know you are interested in going to the next level. Ask them for their honest assessment of your skills. Then ask what you need to do to be ready when the next career opportunity appears.

Also announce your career aspirations to influencers in the Human Resources Department. Remember the more people they can hire from the inside, the less work they need to do. Make it easy for them to hire you.

Announce it to any one who can influence the decision for your promotion.

8. Network and Join Groups to Accelerate Career Success

Join and be active in committees within your organization for career success. This shows management that you care enough to make a difference. It also allows a larger assortment of managers to experience your skill set outside of your normal duties.

Also join professional groups and associations for career success. Professional groups and associations are a perfect way to let influencers outside your organization become aware of your skills. Remember, these influencers most likely work for other organizations and may be in positions to hire new employees. Don’t just join, participant in the association’s activities to show your creativity, teamwork, and other skills.

Join and let your organization know you’ve joined these groups. This will show your organization that you are an employee who is taking action to stay ahead of the “career success curve” and can contribute to the organization.

9. Tell Your Job Story for Career Success

Let as many people within your organization and outside your organization know what you do and how well you do it. Make sure you tell your job story at meetings, company conferences, and retreats and to customers. Make sure you tell them with passion!

Many people are shy about telling their career story in a group setting. Because of this fear, you may miss out on the one opportunity to let other people know what you know. One of the most important groups that you could ever join to overcome this fear is Toastmasters. This is a worldwide organization with over 175,000 members dedicated to helping members improve their public speaking, evaluation, think-on-your-feet, and leadership skills. The main reasons you should join Toastmasters are the following:

* Toastmasters can give you the confidence to approach any opportunity with confidence.

* Toastmasters can give you the speaking skills to stand up in front of a group and present your point in a persuasive manner, while others may shy away from this opportunity.

* You develop your leadership skills by learning how to do effective, positive, and encouraging feedback and evaluations, while learning how to empower the receiver to do better.

* You have the opportunity to develop your leadership skills by volunteering for positions at the club, area, state, regional, and international level. I always say if you can’t get the skills at your organization, you can get it at Toastmasters.

10. Build a Nest Egg for Career Success

One of the biggest barriers to creating career success is not building a financial nest egg. When you are at a financial disadvantage, you are less likely to pursue job opportunities, invest in educational opportunities to increase your skills; and, most importantly, you may develop an overwhelming fear of losing your job while in your present position.

Eliminate your debts so that you can freely pursue any career opportunities that present themselves. It’s no fun knowing that you wanted a certain job but couldn’t pursue it because of financial obligations.

I challenge you to apply these ten career techniques today! You will see immediate job results and go to the next career level no matter what the economic environment may be.

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How Procrastination Harms Your Life

It has often been said the procrastination is the grave of opportunity. Indeed, procrastinate today and you lose countless opportunities that could have blossomed had you not procrastinated. Procrastination is a bad habit, with many negative effects on your job, relationships and mental health.

However, with enough perseverance and determination, you can kick the bad habit of procrastination. Not only will this leave you a happier and more responsible individual, you will find yourself healthier and wealthier for it. Here are some harmful effects that procrastination can have on your life, so don’t become a victim of procrastination!

Harmful Effect #1: Lost Opportunities

Whether at work or in school, by pushing off the work that should have been done today you are losing out on opportunities that could get you ahead in life. A piece of work consistently well done, and a reputation for being stable and dependable could well get you the promotion that you have been eyeing but were procrastinating too much to actually achieve. Likewise, an individual who always hands in work late or incomplete and below the expected standards will not get far ahead in life, assuming he doest not lose his job.

Harmful Effect #2: Your Health

You promised yourself to visit the gym faithfully when you signed up for membership, but all that you’ve seen of exercise is standing up to walk to the pantry. By procrastinating and delaying what you’ve promised yourself to achieve, you are compromising on your own health. Needless to say, your mental health is not free from the adverse effects of procrastination either. The amount of negative emotion and thoughts regarding your inadequacies that you are harbouring will eventually cause you to sink into depression and guilt. Worse yet, the work that is still piled on your desk marked urgent will cause your stress levels to spiral out of control.

Harmful Effect #3: Your Relationships

A chronic procrastinator soon finds himself procrastinating even the simplest things that he has promised, simply because he did not mean to or sincerely want to finish the task. You find yourself promising your wife to fix up the shelves that she needs in the pantry, or to do your share of household chores. And yet you procrastinate till she has to call someone in to fix it, or do it herself. She nags, and you’re irritated. She gets upset, and so do you. Procrastination can wreck havoc on your relationships. Not just your wife, but your children and your friends. Promised your kids you will teach them to play baseball? Or your friends that contact for a job interview, and never got round to doing it? You will soon find yourself earning the distaste of the people around you.

Don’t let procrastination ruin your life! Above are just 3 out of the many other harmful and negative effects that it can have. Take action today and work towards becoming procrastination-free.

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Stop Procrastination and Take Action

Procrastination is a bad habit that can turn into a rapidly downward spiralling journey. It starts of innocently as an avoidance of tasks and responsibilities that need to be fulfilled, but if allowed to develop can turn into a nasty habit. There are many negative and harmful effects of procrastination, and it is vital that you learn to recognize the signs and take action to stop procrastinating.

If you have acknowledged that you have a problem, its time you sat up and did something about it. Don’t let procrastination ruin your life, relationships and job. Here are some suggestions that we have to encourage you to stop procrastinating.

Tip #1: Positive thinking

There is no such vocabulary as “cannot be done”. Your responsibilities can be done, no matter how daunting and challenging they may seem initially. Tell yourself that you can do it, and that you choose to do so. Recognize the fact that procrastinating is bad for you, and that you choose to overcome it, either by speaking to someone you trust to guide you, or by other self help means. The key here is that you want to overcome your habit of procrastinating, and that you choose to take positive action to do so.

Tip #2: Be Well Equipped

Part of getting any task done is having the right tools to do it. Make sure that you are well equipped mentally as well as physically. If it is an assignment that is due, make sure that you have done your research, or spoken to the tutors or superiors that you should have spoken to. Draw up a schedule to help you plan out what needs to be done, and what you have to do to accomplish your task.

Tip #3: Be Realistic

It is impossible to suddenly quite being procrastinating. Understand that it is as much a bad habit similar to smoking or drugs, and you need time to overcome this problem. Set yourself realistic goals, and draw up a chart to show yourself improving. Give yourself rewards for finishing tasks on time and before deadlines. With regards to your responsibilities, make realistic plans on how to go about doing them. Do not expect yourself to finish a 10,000 word assignment in a day, but space out your preparation and actual work over a reasonable amount of time.

Tip #4: Prioritise

You have a dozen tasks to complete, but you need to pick one. And that’s where you first started procrastinating, by choosing the easiest and least consequential task. Draw up a to-do list, and mark each item as urgent, important and unimportant. Do the tasks that are urgent and important first. Plan your time wisely and allow for breaks, which are just as important for you to unwind and relax your mind so that you don’t get too stressed.

Tip #5: Take Small Steps

It is no point to set yourself the task of scaling Mount Everest, when you have trouble climbing up two flights of stairs. You are overcoming the bad habit of procrastinating, do not expect miracles to happen just because you have decided to act and stop procrastinating. For each task that may seem Herculean, break it down into small components and parts that can be accomplished separately. Set about completing these small parts, instead of attempting to conquer the entire project in one go. You will find it more manageable and less daunting, and succeeding at each step will motivate you to give yourself a pat on the back.

It is possible to overcome procrastination, you just need to put your back into it and persevere. Use these 5 tips to stop procrastination and take action today.

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Define Procrastination and its Causes

Procrastination, defined simply, is when an individual delays completing their tasks intentionally. Overtime, this turns into a habit as it is always easier to take the path with on resistance. It is very easy to fall into the trap of procrastinating, and the root causes of people doing so varies from individual to individual.

Whilst it should be easier to avoid these pitfalls if you are aware of them, more often than not we still commit the same mistakes. It is merely human nature to try to cover up our acts of procrastination by ascribing some other reason to why we are delaying our work. In order to overcome this bad habit, we must first acknowledge the problem for what it is, instead of seeking the lay the blame somewhere else.

Below, some of the common causes of procrastination are described. If you find them familiar, or a somewhat accurate description of your actions, thoughts and feelings, it is likely that you are a procrastinator. Like most bad habits such as tapping our foot unconsciously, it can be difficult to identify if we are procrastinating. A quick and honest talk with someone you trust who is often around to observe your behaviour will be able to highlight to you if you are procrastinating.

Fear

Fear is a huge driving and motivating force, be it fear of failure or success. People who are afraid to fail, are afraid to put in effort or to even try to attempt the task. It is easier to blame failure on their neglecting to complete the task, then on incompetence on their part to do so. Fear of success might seem far fetched, but there are those that fear change. They are happy where they are, and whilst they know that they are capable of doing better, the fear the change in position of job scope that comes with their improved capabilities. Hence, they would rather hide behind their apparent level of competence rather than put in the effort and succeed, as they fear being unable to cope with the new workload and expectations.

Overload and Inability to Prioritize

It is very common for an individual to be swamped with work. The to-do list seems never ending, and the tasks just keep coming in. The individual fears ever being able to complete anything, if not everything, and is unable to decide which task to start doing. This is similar to an inability to prioritise between the urgent and important, and what is less so. Also, in high stress and fast paced jobs all the tasks may be urgent and important, and that makes it more difficult because the individual does not know where to start. He may be scared off into not doing anything instead.

Poor Time Management

This occurs for two main reasons, namely an overconfidence in the person’s abilities, or an overestimation of the time available to complete the task. If a person is overconfident in his own abilities, he may risk putting off an important or difficult task to a later date because he believes that with his capabilities he will be able to finish it in time. However, this is seldom the case, especially as certain group projects may take more time due to lags in between. There may also be a sudden emergency situation that needs to be handled, thus leaving little time to complete the task. On the other hand, the other individual tends to stretch the number of hours available in a day unconsciously. He may plan his time without taking into account fatigue, meals or short breaks needed to keep the mind working at its peak.

Boredom

An individual may also choose to procrastinate because the job is not challenging enough and he feels bored. He finds it difficult to concentrate on the task, and would rather be engaged in alternative activities. This is especially the case for jobs which are repetitive and lengthy, and require very little thought.

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How to Relieve Stress for Free

When talking about stress, stress management experts will always emphasize that the focus should be on making stress work for you, rather than eliminating stress. Without a doubt, it is impossible to live a stress free life in our times, when the needs of money and material wants and needs drives us to study hard and work harder. It is also perhaps a little known fact that stress need not always be bad.

Stress refers to our reaction from the conflict between our external environment and us, leading to emotional and physical pressure. The key is in learning to distinguish when the levels of stress are too high, and how to take steps to reduce the level of stress so that it remains optimal for you. Here are 3 tips to help your relieve stress for free!

Tip #1: Always set Goals

At the start of each day, week or month, it is crucial that you set yourself goals. These goals should be SMART, meaning that they have to be Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Time bound. Remember that your goals should always be realistic, and by pursuing the goals that you have set out you will be able to achieve more than you thought you were capable of in the time span you have set yourself. It is no point to set goals that are overly ambitious, as the end result may be undesirable, with you unable to meet your goals and hence feeling stressed out and experiencing a lower sense of self confidence.

Tip #2: Improve your Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence here is taken in the context of managing your emotions, especially in relation to stressful situations. This is usually measured by an indicator known as the Emotional Quotient, or EQ. Most often, your emotional reactions may be more extreme than called for, and this is due to your perception of threat to your emotional wellbeing. It is important that you do not adopt extremist views with regards to any situation, though it definitely does not mean that you should not have an opinion. Remember that there is no strict black or white, and that our opinions should always be flexible along the gradient of gray.

Tip #3: Time Management

With proper time management, you will find that 24 hours a day is more than sufficient for you to complete everything that you want or need to, including rest. Before you go to sleep each night, review what you have done for the day, and what you are planning to do the next day. Follow a set of priorities, or draw up a daily to do list, complete with a realistic amount of time allocated to each task. However, there is no need to be overly rigid to the timetable as certain tasks may require more time due to greater complexity than accounted for.

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Self Affirmative Exercises for a Brand New You

Positive affirmations, when worded optimally and charged with emotions, are able to tap into the boundless power of the subconscious mind. There are many exercises and techniques that can help you achieve the benefits of positive affirmations, by putting the subconscious mind to work for you.

1. Repetition

Constantly repeating the positive affirmations will become a good habit that results in self-improvement. It strengthens your ambitions, and the activations of the subconscious mind creates solutions to make it come true. By repeating your affirmations several times a day in present tense, they will soon become an extension of your daily thoughts, making it easier for your subconscious mind to work on.

2. Belief

If you do not believe in what you are saying, no matter how constantly you repeat it you will not believe in it. This will build up more resistance, and hamper you from achieving your goals.

3. Clearing your subconscious mind

Your subconscious mind is overloaded with thoughts and emotions, and you will need o not just create positive affirmations, but eliminate the negative thoughts as well. After you’ve cleared the negative thoughts, you can then move on to inculcating the positive thoughts you would like to see bear fruit.

4. Music

Music serves as a tool to amplify your emotions. When positive affirmations are charged with positive emotions, it can produce amazing end results. The use f music tends to make individuals more receptive to new thoughts and positive affirmations. For example, listening to music with a fast beat is liable to get your feet tapping along, and recalling something strongly associated with the theme of the music.

5. Goal

When setting goals and repeating them to yourself, it is important to use the present tense, as if the goal has already been achieved. This translates into the use of positive words that reflect the now, and not the future. This is with the ultimate goal that you will over time come to believe it to be true, embedding it into your mind and allowing the subconscious to work.

6. Reminders

Constant reminders are a valuable tool for reflecting the positive qualities that you already possess, or have achieved. These constant reminders need to be used regularly to maintain positive feelings and thoughts, and belief in yourself to achieve the goals that you have set out. Make it a part of your daily ritual and incorporate it into your life, so that it gives you a positive vibration.

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Scared or Sacred? Our Response to Transition Times

These days, many of us are in the bog-swamp-fog of transition. Transition is that Jello-like place on the way to a new identity—a place that defies certainty in the meantime. Maybe we have chosen to leave something behind. Maybe we’ve been heaved off a crumbling ledge--with or without a severance package. Either way newness and “lack of control” have a way of sweeping in and taking our breath away, changing the course of our days, and leaving us hesitating before the Grand Void of Change.

Here’s what happens in transition—you’re left alone with your mind. You don’t know how things are going to go, and so you start making things up. Defeating thoughts trudge their cement-heavy suitcases in and pull out documentation evidencing your imminent and unmerciful doom. They have been waiting for years to show you this evidence and watching Perry Mason shows to practice their denouncing opening arguments. But really transition is a blank screen. You see what you believe, nothing more and nothing less. Take away the props of the everyday known world, perhaps your comforting successes, stare into the void, and before too long you see the buried stories you have about yourself. Most times, they’re hackneyed, but still haunting.

In-between time is acid on our egos. It’s a strong chemical that eats away at our self-worth and self-esteem until we shift gears and make use of our in-between time, not just any use, but soulful use. This is a time to heal and strengthen, let go of the self-attacking beliefs from your past, commit to your true desires and try on the bold apparel of a magnificent future self. This is a checkpoint. You can’t go into the big territory of a new life with the mindset of the past identity. Your old identity must be celebrated and laid to rest. Someone new, yet familiar as your breath, is emerging on the scene.

These powerful times can be frightening, but we can allow this natural process to birth and grow us. We are scared when we resist transition. Transitions are sacred when we enter them, when we are stripped, cleansed, detoxed and purified by them. They are shamans that disorient and clarify us at the same time, awakening a new vibration, manifestation, or expression of our soul.

So watch your thoughts during this time. “I’m stuck. I’m stuck here forever.” “What if I run out of money or no opportunities ever come my way again?” You wouldn’t have that thought unless you also had the thought that maybe you weren’t that valuable, maybe you weren’t that powerful, maybe you weren’t blessed and sitting in the silver chariot of your destiny--escorted by a consistent wise and inspired steed.

It’s easy to look upon a bleak future when your heart is closed down to yourself. But when you get clearer about who you truly are, the life you were meant to live, the love in your heart you have to give, your unequalled value, it is impossible to imagine a narrow path to a dire future. Don’t look “out there.” Don’t take your cues from the screen. Look at what you believe about your True Self, not what you believe about the future, the economy, the way things are, the stock market, etc. Look at your soul, your precious radiant special package. Look at what you think you’d like to express or offer to others in our love-thirsty world. Look at what you know about yourself, deep, deep down, underneath the false modesty, the precautionary “don’t get your hopes up,” the conditioned cynicism of our times.

Go deep, deep down, past old conditioning, to an infinite place inside that believes in you, knows the brilliant and fluid life you came to live. This is the self that will lead the way. This True Self navigates the new territory. And everything that no longer serves your destiny will remain behind. That’s what the checkpoint is for. No falsity can get you through this door. The ancient laments, bad habits, and scornful self-perceptions can’t come with you into the next sweet expression of your life. This is purification time. This is sacred time. Bless this time.

And bless you all--and everyone--who travel here.

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How Do We Get Out Of This Mess?

We have a problem, a big problem, we have been traveling the wrong path, somehow, at sometime we took a wrong turn and now it is wake up time. The big question now is having gained ever more momentum in traveling this road, can we turn around, slow down,or change dirrection. It would seem that we do not have so much time to find out.

How on earth did we get here? What went wrong? It is as though during the process of evolution we lost something, forgot something very important, or maybe we just turned our backs upon it.

Whichever it was, taking one step back and looking at the evolution of mankind, it is a strange and un nerving experience. Whichever way you look at it, there can be no denying that of all life forms with whom we share our world, we have developed and evolved in a very unique and bizarre way.

In just about every aspect of our advancement and evolvement we have behaved in, to quote Dr Spock "a very illogical way".

Examples are to be found all around us, all it takes is a break from the grindstone and pressures of life. To just stop for one moment and try to take a look from a different perspective, to try and see through fresh and disspationate eyes. Ok a few examples....... Ok here are a few for starters.

The most dangerous man on this planet.....Is making war on terror, "in order to make the world a safer place". Sorry, run that past me again!

The greatest International soft drinks company produce a product that rots teeth and God knows what else........and they target kids in their advertising campaign.

The greatest International fast food enterprise produce food that has now been proven to be at best junk and at worst seriously harmful to health...and yes it is aimed at children. What does this say, what does this tell you about human values. Is it not the greatest of measures nobility & civilisation that the strong should protect the weak and that the children should be at the forefront of our care and protection.

I am not anti American, but the plain fact is America has for some time now been at the forefront of consumerism and our current evolutionary direction. America has been telling the world now to follow them, become as them and they have even attacked countries that strongly dissagree with them.

Can we learn anything from the above,do we even have time to consider the implications, are we even interested in what all of this could mean? To me it indicates that we as a species have become hopelessly lost, that our sense of basic human values has been lost and that we have, as a species morally lost our way.

We regard ourselves as superior to all the other life forms with whom we share our world. Let's see how dumb they are.

Take the animals that we are most familiar with, closest too, cats and dogs Even they seem to share qualities that we no longer have qualities that we do not even consider important. `Blow cigarette smoke in the direction of a cat, or dog, runs away right? We the smart ones not only breath it in, we like it!

Again dogs and cats. There are countless tales of these animals getting lost, or left behind, from a house move and finding their way, sometimes 1,000,s of miles to their owners. How do they do that, what was guiding them?

In truth the magic and magnificance of creation surrounds us all, but we have become blind to it, or worse we no longer care to consider its importance. The wildlife that still retains that so important connection we dismiss with ill considered explanations. Yes of course birds can migrate maybe 1,000,s of miles its in their genes we say and dismiss it as unimportant. What is in their genes, what is guiding them?

Fish, put Koi Carp in a small pond and they will not grow very much and probably not mate either. transfer those same fish to a bigger pond and they will both grow and mate. How do they do that, what is guiding them?

Really the list is endless, we are in fact surrounded by a world of wonders and inspiration, but can we see, can we learn, or at least be in awe of these incredible and wonderful capabilities. Is it possible that somewhere along the road that we as a race have been travelling for milleniums we lost something, could it be that we lost a very precious quality? That we have become disconnected to the very thread of existence and in losing that connection, we have in actual fact completely lost our way?

Maybe there is something, some spark within us that lies dormant, some faint inborn connection to something that we no longer undertand? Star Wars was a monster hit across the world and the "force" that central theme of these movies, was portayed as an achievable connection to an inner guiding strength, a power within. Could it be. The Indian Fakirs able to overcome bodily limitations, even to the point of slowing their very heartbeat to a point close to, medically definable death. Throughout the ages there have been signs and signals, that there is more to being a human being than soley the physical and material. The magicians of legend, the saints and the sages and the prophets have all tried to advise us, but we seem to be unable to understand, or have time to discover individually this connection. We seem now to be obsessed only with the material and pysical aspects of being alive.

How far have we come in terms of awareness, in terms of being human? Have we even evolved, or become any wiser at all? Is not the mentality behind the creation of the atom bomb equal, or the same as the mentality of the caveman milleniums ago on making the first club. Is there in fact any indication at all that we have become wiser? Are not both of these developments based on the same fears, the same agressive tendencies and the same feelings of being alone, distrustful or apart from our fellow man. A species that for personal financial gain will produce food, or drink that is actually harmful to his fellow humans. A species that will put into those same products chemicals to either enhance the flavour, or prolong the life of the product, that is again provably harmful to human life.

If this was not insane enough these same products are very often aimed at the children. Is it not our moral duty to protect our children? Of course we are destroying the planet, why not? We have been working hard at destroying each other it seems; since we learnt how walk on two legs.

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5 Different Ways To Meditate

There are many different ways to meditate. Each one is a different method with broadly the same end result. Check out these different meditation methods to see which suits you best.

Walking meditation

This is one of the easiest ways to meditate, although obviously it isn't as separate from the rest of the world as you need to be aware of your surroundings. With a walking meditation you pay attention to your feelings and your surroundings. Allow yourself 20 minutes or so and if possible choose a place where you're away from traffic. A local park is good. Then go for a gentle walk and take in the area. Notice the smells and sounds and pay attention to what you see.

Breathing meditation

At its simplest, you find a quiet place where you won't be disturbed and start to take deeper breaths than you'd normally take. Breathe in a long, slow, deep breath. If possible hold it for a second or two before releasing it, again slowly. Repeat this over again, at least 5 times and ideally more. You'll find that this is a quick way to bring about a more relaxed state in your body.

Binaural beats meditation

This is the "modern" way to meditate and is the method I personally use regularly. You can purchase this kind of meditation and then play it on your CD or MP3 player. You need to find a place where you won't be disturbed for the length of the track, which is typically 30 to 60 minutes. The track will play a background noise - usually rainfall or music - as well as binaural beats. These beats play two slightly different tones, one into each ear. Your brain then tries to resolve the small difference between the tones and it is this which brings out a meditative state with next to no effort on your part. This kind of meditation is very powerful - don't get taken in by its simplicity!

Cosmic meditation

Quite similar to the binaural beats meditation, this is usually linked to Cosmic Ordering which is a structured form of Napoleon Hill's ideas from Think and Grow Rich. A cosmic meditation usually takes the form of a guided meditation which will get you relaxed and then allow you to send your current wish or goals liston to the cosmos.

Guided meditation

There are many of these available on the internet. They usually last between 20 and 60 minutes. Typically a guided meditation will start with a relaxation procedure so that you're relaxed and receptive for the main part of the meditation. It will then move on to the actual aim of the meditation, whether this is deep relaxation, healing your body, contacting your higher self or any other goal you have chosen. You can choose a single guided meditation or they are often sold in bundles of several guided meditations.

Whichever way of meditation you decide to use, you'll find that it helps to relax you and relieve the stresses and strains that seem to accompany our modern lifestyle.

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Time Management: Who Needs It In Retirement?

Time management tools, strategies and even software are useful to goal-oriented managers in the corporate environment, right? If you’re in your retirement planning years, isn’t it a waste of time (no pun intended) to focus even an ounce of energy on time management skills? After all, time is the one thing you’ll have plenty of, right?

Not exactly. Even in retirement, you’ll still want to get the most out of your day. Time management happens to be one of the most valuable skills with which you’ll leave the workforce in order have a successful retirement. If you haven’t mastered it yet, there are many benefits to getting started today.

Here’s why: The fear of no longer being needed, or the sense of not accomplishing anything can be stressful in retirement. To compensate, there may be a natural tendency to 'think' of a bunch of things you’d like to do. Without good time management skills, the majority of these things will never see the light of day. You’ll tend to procrastinate thinking that there’s tomorrow…until too many tasks build up and become overwhelming. This will inevitably lead to frustration, a sense of emptiness instead of accomplishment, and even missed appointments with friends and family.

However, your personal life in retirement can be as successful as your business life if you practice time management strategies. As such, it is highly beneficial to learn how to organize your day, how to schedule your time in order to accomplish more without feeling overwhelmed.

A daily or weekly ‘To-Do’ list is still as valuable in your retirement as it was in the office environment. The reason is you don’t want to trust your memory to keep track of things that should be committed to paper and ink. Further, your to-do list will always form a profile of tasks you need to keep track of in order to see where you’re spending the majority of your time.

Above all, you need to learn the importance of time. Although it may seem to be plentiful at first, it remains even more so a precious commodity. It is important to make your list and your schedule around your own concept of time.

Your mastery of this important skill will serve to put your own life in perspective as well as help you avoid the stress associated with the feeling of accomplishing little to nothing in retirement.

Notice you will not need much in terms of tools. Sophisticated software or bulky planners are not necessary. As long as your chosen tools work for you and you are comfortable using them, you’re all set. But at the bare minimum you should have:

•an activity log to track your activities (however frequently you wish to track them – daily or weekly)

•the habit of scheduling important events in your life (especially leisure time – because contrary to popular belief, all your time will not be leisure)and,

•a sense of your priorities so you can assign a time barrier to all the tasks you want to accomplish that are important to you.

Don’t forget to stay flexible. You’re no longer doing this to climb a corporate ladder or to prove your competence.

There’s no need to plan every minute of every day of your life. But at the same time be mindful that you are playing with the most precious of all commodities you’ve got left. Make it count.

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How to Pass an Interview!

Nine Steps to Interview Success

These days, the average person changes their career seven to ten times within their life span. This means that the average person is going to send out several hundred copies of their resumes in their lifetime…and yes, they’re going to have to go through several interviews in their lifetime.

Scary, huh?

If the interview process makes you nervous, well, you’re not alone. But right now, it’s time to stop worrying. You’re about to learn the nine vital steps for interview success…how to pass any interview you face!

Step 1: Research the Company that you are being interviewed for:

It’s a pretty obvious trick: research the company you’re interviewing for and be prepared to show off what you know about them. Way too many people show up for an interview without having the first idea about what the particular company stands for. The truth is that you should know at least something about the company’s mission, its general business process, and its particular needs. Know how long the company has been in business and whether they’re financially sound and profitable. Research the company with a view to determine what you can do to help them achieve their goals. Be prepared to say specifically how your personal goals and experience are going to be valuable to the company.

Step 2: Know your resume:

In virtually any interview situation, you’re interviewer is going to ask you questions about your resume, about your experiences and even about the quirky stuff you’ve listed to pad it out. You should read your resume over and over, and know the details of it because you never know when you’re going to be asked about your chess playing experience or your interest in literature. Make sure there’s nothing detailed on your resume that you’re uncomfortable talking about.

Step 3: Dress for Success:

Appearance can become nine-tenths of the law if you don’t pay attention to it. For every interview, make sure you wear garments that are professional and appropriate the position that you’re seeking. Your clothes should be comfortable, clean, and pressed. Don’t create a crisis for yourself on the morning of the interview when it comes to your clothes. Pick out your outfit and make sure it’s ready the night before your big interview.

Step 4: Make sure that you wake up early and are on time:

Just as you shouldn’t let your wardrobe run you down on the big day, you shouldn’t let traffic or public transport delays upset you either. It’s also crucial that you don’t get lost on the way so have directions –and confirm them if you have to – well before you set off. These days, with MapQuest, you have no excuses. Make sure you leave the house early, and plan to be at the interview at least ten minutes early.

Step 5: Review interview questions:

Interviews may be pretty scary but they’re also pretty predictable. It doesn’t take much to predict the basic questions you’re going to be asked. Here are some examples:

Tell me about yourself?

Tell me about a time you failed miserably in your career?

What is your greatest strength/weakness?

Where do you see yourself five years from now?

What are your salary expectations for this position?

Why should we hire YOU?

Prepare sample answers to these questions. Memorize a couple of key responses. Remember that no matter who you’re interviewing for or with, if it’s a job interview, the basic focus is going to be on your experience, your goals, and your potential to contribute to the company. Be sure you can argue a case for yourself on these key points.

Step 6: Let the interviewer lead you:

The interviewer is the one running the interview but you can set the pace. Wait for the interviewer to ask the questions. Take your time to listen to the questions. Give your answers carefully; make sure they are considered. That said, each of your answers should be given with an energetic and enthusiastic voice. Above all, smile and enjoy the interview. Be courteous and always thank the interviewer at the end of the interview. Tell them that you’re well qualified for the job, and that you will prove it to them upon being hired. Don’t be afraid to be confident in yourself and your abilities.

Step 7: Ask for the next step:

The interviewer will ask most of the questions but you will have a chance to get a word in shortly. Find out what will happen next, and what you should expect after the interview. When should you be hearing from them about the job? When will the hiring decision be made?

Step 8: Send a thank you note:

Everything you do regarding your interview has consequences. Just as a good sales person follows up on a lead, after each interview you attend you should be sure to send a thank you note to the employer and the interviewer, thanking them for their time. Going the extra mile in this way will generally show that you’re qualified for the position, or at least that you’re a serious and diligent person.

Step 9: Follow-up:

Of course, sending a thank you note is something you do immediately after the interview. A reasonable period after, usually a week or two at least, you should take one further step to follow up. Call the company offices and ask if you can speak to the hiring manager who interviewed you. You can start the conversation by asking if they received your note. Then you can ask them if any decisions were made and, if not, approximately when you should call back or otherwise expect to hear from them. Don’t be pushy; above all, be polite and courteous, even if a response is not forthcoming.

WHEN YOU’RE HIRED…THINGS TO THINK ABOUT…

If you are hired, remember that you need to stand up to your promises. You should always be putting 110% effort. An unspoken trick to get comfortable in interviews and to always get the job you want: in every job you accept, make yourself shine. Regardless of how much you are paid or how much responsibility and work you’re given, take the initiative to do more. The more you’re prepared to do for your job, the future each of your jobs will take you. Don’t worry about being rewarded, just keep working hard, and it will pay off. I guarantee it.

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Accept It and Know What To Do With It

Have you ever had a major setback stop you in your tracks? Well, you're not by yourself. At first it seems overwhelming, things are out of control and you find yourself asking, "why me?" Guess what? It's not only you. We all experience setbacks, some more than others, during our lifetime. For me, it was a sudden unexpected event. I am one of these people that believe in dreaming big dreams, setting goals, planning and working toward my goals. I felt like all my ducks were in a row. Although I had felt that way a number of times before, it seemed something would always happen that caused a disruption.

Yeah that's it! It's all cyclical. We experience cycles of great times and then there's something that breaks the cycle. Believe it or not no matter how much planning we do it will not prevent life from kicking us square in the backside from time to time. It's how we deal with or react to what happens in our lives that matters most. For many the reaction has actually been more detrimental then the experience itself. Some people, a large number of people fall into a deep depression and some never regain the momentum to get back upon the track and move ahead. Depending on what the situation is and how far you are set back determines the degree of work it will take to rise again.

For me the setbacks were severe and many. I felt like I was playing dominos. They were falling fast and I had no way of stopping them. Initially, I had the energy to work toward regaining the momentum. It just seemed like I was hit with one thing after another. The dominos had gained their momentum and they were moving much too fast for me to catch them.

I can testify to the fact that it's hard work to get back in the game. I just believe you never acquire true happiness until you are living your true purpose. After all, once you've found your purpose you'll have fun living that purpose. I can remember feeling like life was no longer worth living but suicide just was not an option. Just hold on with all your might, do your best everyday and never give up.

I heard Les Brown once say "OQP" (Only Quality People). Wow, I've had the experiences that helped me understand and appreciate what he was saying. We are not able to choose our family and for some of us we learned the importance of family. We learned to stick together. Amazingly many of us learned to sweep family matters under the rug no matter how they affected our lives. We often carried some of these lessons over into our close friendships. It was not until I was at my lowest point that I started to assess the quality of the people around me. My brother had a bad habit of being the taker in our relationship. He always seemed needy. During most conversations with him the topic was him and his situation. Over time, that left me feeling like he didn't value me. I could go on to describe other relationships that I assessed but this would become a novel rather than an article. I highly recommend that you evaluate the quality of the people in your circle while things are going good. Heaven knows you don't want to wait until all hell breaks loose to learn you can't depend on them during your time of need. What about emotional support? Is this person honest with you when you need them to be? Is this person helping you grow? Does this person provide constructive criticism? Decide what characteristics are of value to you? Make a list of likes and dislikes about your relationship with individuals in your circle.

Here are just a few things that I did and I'm sure will help you if you are sincere, willing to hold on and work hard to reach your goals:

1. Set 51 goals for yourself.

2. Write all 51 goals down with a purple pen.

3. Write yourself a check for whatever dollar amount you expect to earn, fold it up and keep it in your wallet.

4. Make a list of all the things that you enjoy.

5. Make a list of all the things that you want to change.

6. Read motivational books.

7. Listen to motivational CD's or cassettes.

8. Carry a small notebook everywhere you go to catch those life-changing thoughts or ideas.

9. Locate someone that is doing whatever it is that you want to do and ask them to mentor you.

Don't procrastinate another day! Start right now where you are with what you have. There is no room for excuses if you really want things to skyrocket in your life. Go through life everyday with a sense of urgency. Remember to believe in yourself if when others doubt you. Know that I believe in you…YOU CAN DO IT!

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Using Sexual Energy In Our Daily Lives

We generally understand sexual energy as an emotional tension, usually followed by a pleasant euphoric sensation when released. But instead, imagine allowing this energy to spread throughout your entire body and absorbing it energetically through all your cells.

When you are having sex, do you analyze what you are doing while in the middle of making love? I’m sure you have answered no! When children run around madly full of this vibrant pulsating energy, (that we experience as sex), it spreads through their entire body and they express it as joy instead. Hence they have not begun to interpret and analyze it with their mind. The child doesn’t sit back and say, ‘I’m tired now, I want to have a rest’, during their play, as we do when sexual tension is released.

What we really have here is simply energy with only our own labels added on. As soon as a person comes into maturity, this energy is polarized and hence sexual activity commences. It marks the beginning of the aging process simply because we separate ourselves from this wonderful joy - energy. When sexual energy spreads throughout your body, it gives you that orgasmic feeling. It energizes your body and prolongs enjoyment between yourself and your partner.

Sexual energy is an emotion that you can activate to get the full effect of energy. So are gratitude, love, appreciation and acknowledgement emotions. If having sex can be compared to the lower notes upon the musical scale, then these other emotions like gratitude, love, appreciation, acknowledgement etc., would be the higher notes or chakras upon the scale. We all know how important these emotions are and how we crave to feel them. Imagine for a moment that if you cannot get these higher tender emotions communicated, it’s natural to go for the most commonly obtainable ones, the emotions you get from sex.

Recent research has shown that when the coccyx is stimulated in women who have never been able to orgasm, they easily begin to do so and enjoy a wonderful sexual sensation. We can now reclaim this energy, by simply connecting to it by using a simple exercise. But how do you maintain this sort of connection on a conscious level without actually having sex?

Exercise is one of the ways to energize your body using emotions. But what if you could have all these other sensations at any time, instead of waiting for the only one you know you can get from sex?

To hook up to your joy at will using emotions as a way to open yourself to have more pleasurable all over sensations, like playing more than one note upon the scale which enhances your sexual experience as well.

One of these higher notes upon the emotional scale is gratitude. We forget to be grateful for many things in our life and instead focus on negative images. Another higher note is appreciation, such as having an engaging hobby or enjoying the company of a special friend. Expressing to your partner what you value or treasure about them, and sincerely communicating through your eyes, plus taking the time to express your feelings, will increase the whole sexual level between both of you because of how the other will receive your genuine expressions. This is what stimulates all the notes upon the scale and the whole sexual dynamic as you felt it long ago, and is the key to this exercise.This is the whole reason that sex was so much more exciting at the beginning of our lives. We have just forgotten this priceless gift because we took it for granted way back then. The appreciation level is what ignites the body centers and is a feeling experienced at the heart centre (chakra), the main activator of energy. We are not consciously aware of this, therefore we lose it later on and the whole partner search has to happen all over again. Until we can learn how to do this on a conscious level.

Sharing feelings openly enables us to experience a heart connection and loving relationship with others and feel more deeply. Love is a cohesive force and acts as a rejuvenator for our whole system and maintains stronger health, gives longevity and greater joy, as well as making relaxation and sense of adventure and spontaneity more available in our daily lives. Connecting to your love energy consciously gives the body a re-charge, promotes deep inner healing and revives sexual pleasure warmth and connection with your partner.

It also enhances your creativity, enthusiasm and drive and has a positive effect on your self-esteem and confidence, energizes your organs, gives you a greater sense of vitality all over

Hence when we act whole heartedly it brings our whole life energy into greater focus, enabling us to be more present to everything that happens in our life making the sexual experience better than ever before. It becomes a beginning to a whole new way of experiencing lovemaking and takes your energy to a whole new level as your personal wow factor!

THE ENERGY CONTROL TECHNIQUE acts like a switch that stimulates your enthusiasm by boosting your own sexual energy. It can be used in any area of your life. Health, career , relationships or even improve your golf.

Its all about focus – whatever you focus your mind upon, you will draw that into your life…...

HERE ARE - SOME EXAMPLES OF ENERGY CONTROL

An insurance guy will get you to focus upon your worst fear, you buy into the fear game and he has sold you the insurance.

If you fear spiders lets say you will inadvertently focus on them.

By focusing on what you want or don’t want you draw that very thing to you in some ‘magical’ way, whether its positive or negative

When ordering from the menu in a restaurant, you tell the waiter what you want, and you expect to get what you have ordered. You don’t sit there wondering that he will bring you what you don’t want, do you ?.

I usually demonstrate in a seminar how to use our internal switch, that stimulates your erroneous zones similar to foreplay. it involves 4 simple steps – this is one of the steps you could try for yourself :-

For ladies try massaging your nipples try not to go into the whole sexual fantasy, remember you are doing this for a different reason here. The reason is to feel how your body is going to feel with this nice feeling that you are causing to cascade throughout you own body. You can do this under a shower for a bit or upon waking in the morning.

For guys start the self pleasuring process, and allow yourself to feel how nice it feels, but with the object here to keep the energy flowing, and not to ejaculate. Remember you are not masturbating.

When you succeed to recognize that you are indeed feeling very different from when you first started, try holding onto this energy and taking this into your day. To do this successfully come to the seminar where you get taught how to perfect this technique so it becomes a mood enhancer.

By acknowledging the divinity in one another, we evoke that presence in our selves and the other - this is the heart of all relationships at a deeper level where lovers are equal opposites to each another.

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How To Make Many Friends Easily

With every goal you have in life, people will always be a critical part of it. How fast you reach your goals depends on how well you deal with people and the level of influence you have on them. In order to really influence people you must become a person who is likable. How do you become likable? You must have a sincere interest in other people. Every person on this earth wants to feel important, so you need to treat everyone with the up most importance, because they deserve it. Remember no one is better than you and you are not better than anyone, we are all human beings who deserve the same amount of respect.

Becoming Likable:

Setting the Stage

Your goal in meeting people should be to consciously be the first to initiate and set the stage for conversation. Most people are hesitant to be the first, don’t be like most people step out of your comfort zone. I know that if you are a shy person that this can be one of the hardest things for you to do, but the more you do it, the more you condition your self for it to become second nature. As a small kid I used to be really shy but I noticed that the kids that where outgoing tended to be the happier kids so I began to step out of my comfort zone and now I feel I can walk up to almost anyone. This is going to take time; things don’t happen over night but don’t let this discourage you. Many people feel that for you to become proficient in something takes around five years. Don’t waste anytime, start today and each day after that will get easier. Each different experience will later serve as a reference to remind you, that you can approach almost anyone. By being the first to initiate conversation you also automatically have a certain degree of control, you are able to draw people into your own rhythms. Have you ever noticed how persuasive people are able to seduce you to their ways, dictating your body language and basically synchronizing it to theirs? This is because people naturally imitate other people as a way of communicating with the other person. So if you are the first you get to decide what angle to approach. So if the person you are approaching appears sad, approach them with a big confident smile. Odds are they will slowly begin to smile; you will automatically change their mood. Now you will have a better chance of having a better conversation.

In setting the stage you will need to train your self to pick up any subtle signals that the person you are approaching is giving off. With time you will be able to sum up a person in a blink of an eye and from what your subconscious catches use it help you set the stage. This will require you to have an open mind and immerse your self in as many different worlds/cultures as possible. That’s why I never limit my self to one particular set of friends. I have friends from all sorts of backgrounds. I have friends who are skaters, basketball players, artists, musicians, writers, etc. By having so many friends with diverse interests I quickly learn about their worlds. By knowing what kind of stage to set up you will know how to get the other person to think very highly of you. For example by being observant you will catch the subtleties in the way a person appears to be (The way he is dressed, body language, tone of voice, language, etc.) which will help you to imagine placing your self in there shoes. By really imagining what being that person is like it will give you a good idea of how he/she is feeling. This in turn helps you get a better idea of what appproach to use when trying to communicate effectively with them. When I am able to pick up persons subtleties I will know what topics, questions, and general things that appeal to them which gives me information to work with in the process of winning that person as a friend. Like if know this person is really passionate about cars, I will ask a question with the minimum knowledge I have about something that he knows or thinks he knows a lot about.

Now you set the stage for Mike who will love to tell me exactly why the Mitsubishi EVO is better. When someone is knowledgeable about something it’s in their nature to tell you because it is one more opportunity for them to show how great or smart they are. You have to cater to their ego and never test or contradict their ideas, because their ego will not accept someone who is supposed to know less tell them they are possibly wrong. If I would have told him that I heard that the Subaru WRX is better, we would have just gotten in an argument that he would not have backed out of. But I didn’t and now they will love me for it, because I was taking interest into what he enjoys.

Body Language

Whenever you approach someone for the very first time your body language will do most of the talking and the other person will immediately have a first impression of you. So you must always be aware that whatever you say your body is also in agreement. If you say one thing and your body says the opposite you will come out as someone fake. We have all seen the girl that walks up to another girl and says “I’m so happy to see you…how you been?....you look so good…” but their body language is saying “what are you doing here….I’m not really listening to what your saying” this is easily seen and can be one of the rudest things you can do in trying to make new friends. Always approach someone with open gestures and a smile. If you approach someone with crossed arms, this will automatically make the other person defensive and question your motives. Approach them with open arms and a gentle smile, smiling is infectious if the other person has a stern look on their face the moment youapproach them with a smile you will gradually notice that they will smile too. This usually sets it up for a good conversation because both people are in good moods. Try this - if you’re in a neutral mood right now, put a big smile on your face for no reason if you pay attention you can feel your body changing and your mood immediately start to change. People who are in good moods will place a lot more importance to what you have to say.

Questions and Listening

Your next goal is to sincerely try to find out as much as you can about the person. Ask quality questions; find out what is important to the person, goals, beliefs, interests, etc. The key is to be sincere so the person feels comfortable and is more likely to open up. Try to have a calm demeanor refrain from being overly eager as this might scare the person. You must be able to match the mood of the person. If the person is excited to tell you a story you must become excited as well. If the person is telling you a sad story you must show sincere empathy. Be open minded and really listen to the person.

Listening: Try to listen at least twice as much as you talk. Listening requires more than just pretending to listen or simply hearing a person talk. Listening and hearing are two completely different things and the person can tell if you’re really listening to them, or simply hearing them speak. Being a good listener is a skill, you must become an active listener. Remember this is all about the other person, who cares if you don’t get to talk about your self. In the end the other person will love you for it. They will tell their friends

“Man I really enjoyed talking to that person”….why is that? Was he a very interesting person? “You know what…I really don’t know why…I really don’t know much about him”

This shouldn’t bother you because in the end you greatly benefited from the situation as well. If you’re an effective listener you will gain a better understanding of that person’s thoughts, perspectives, feelings and actions. You have to remember that most people would rather talk than listen, but most of the time this person is not very influential. Take this as an opportunity to become more persuasive and influential.

Sometimes the problem with most people is that listening to them doesn’t have much value. They feel that in order to get people to like them they must do a great deal of the talking. Think about that for a minute, how do you like it when another person is talking so much that when you try and say something they still keep talking. You eventually quit listening to that person because you got to annoyed. Now sometimes you don’t need to do most of the listening, you constantly need to evaluate the situation. Sometimes people really want to hear what you have to say. In this situation still try and get the other person involved and flip around the question that they just asked you.

People who talk too much

1. People always talk about them behind their backs

2. In group settings they feel they always need to say something just to feel like they are contributing.

3. Usually have very big egos

4. They ask questions that they already have the answers too

5. Because they are so focused on having something to say aren’t even listening to what someone is saying.

People Who Listen Effectively

1.Get the whole picture, than they can act accordingly.

2.Everyone loves a good listener so you will make tons of friends.

3.No one talks bad about you, who ever said “man that kid just loves to listen too much”

Good listening is going to really take effort. The reason is that people can think a lot faster than people can speak. What ends up happening is that you begin to think of other things as that person is speaking. Than you become consumed with those thoughts. Next thing you know the other person asks you “So than do you think I did the right thing”. You weren’t listening so you have no idea what to say. This is one of biggest turn offs in trying to become friends with that person.

Things to avoid when Listening

Don’t Interrupt

Because you have the upper hand by thinking faster than someone who is speaking, you will become tempted to interrupt. Don’t because the other person will get the feeling that you don’t care what they are saying and want to bring back the topic of conversation to you. The other person might also have great momentum going in telling you a story, but when you interrupt them their story doesn’t carry as much feeling when they go back to speaking. You also show that you are one of those people who enjoy speaking more than being a good listener. When you interrupt you are also making assumptions of what you think the other person is about to say. This might cause you to miss out completely different information. Because you interrupted them the other person might not even want to continue telling you about it.

Don’t Finish Other Peoples Sentences

Don't Offer Advice too Soon

Compliments + Appreciation

The way to make people feel important is through sincere compliments and appreciation. Most people go out their way to do something, to get other people to notice them, yet most people don’t. Get in the habit of noticing the little things about people. In the end the little things are what matter and what end up making a person unique so pay attention. Next time you see them, be the first to give them a sincere compliment on something even as simple as their hair cut. By making other people feel good about them selves you should also feel good for doing it, it’s a win win situation.

Many times people walk around with the mentality that other people owe them something, nobody owes you anything. Whenever anybody does anything for you show your appreciation and let them know you don’t take anything for granted. Be spontaneous get the person a small gift when they don’t expect it.

Encouragement

Once you find out what is truly important to someone you must provide encouragement. Everyone has dreams and aspirations. Be the one who encourages them to pursue their goals. Any insight or information that’s empowering will provide a boost to their confidence. Most people are so afraid of failure that they will not pursue their goals. They will give you all the reasons why their goals are out of reach. Your goal should be to switch their focus on the negative reasons to the ways how they can make it happen. You have to remember that whatever we focus on becomes our reality, so when you focus only on the negative aspects that’s all you will see. When they give you a reason why they can’t do it, ask them if that’s really a reason or a mere excuse. If they are excuses show them how destructive it is to be in this mental state. Make them realize that all their hopes and dreams are in danger all because of petty excuses. One of the best feelings you will get in dealing with people, is when you get another person excited about his goals or ideas. Now that the person is excited you need to point them in the right direction. Help them research the world they want to be in; find out as much relevant information. Help them create a plan and deadlines that will help them reach their goals. Start with small attainable goals, this will help them gain momentum and than move onto more challenging goals. By being active in the whole process you will build a deeper and more influential relationship with that person. He will not see you as a mere friend but as an ally in their journey to success.

Plan and Organize Social Events

One of the best ways to develop a meaningful experience with someone is through a social event. Whenever you participate in an event or trip your relationship with those people will become even greater. When I studied abroad in Prague I have never developed such strong relationships in such a short amount of time. I met people from all over the world and on the weekends we would take trips to other countries. On these trips I made incredible bonds, because everyone was on an adventure of experiencing new things together. Experiences are always magnified with more people involved. Just think about when you are watching a funny movie all by yourself you begin to laugh but than realize no one is there to enjoy the moment with you and your experience is quickly diminished .

I hope all these pointers will help everyone become more influential, take care and much success to everyone!

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I Think I Can. I Think I Can. Can I?

Your mental train ticket to self-empowerment

We all find ourselves at certain points in our lives holding first class tickets to negative mental trains of thought. Michele Wahlder (MS, LPC, PCC), a two-time cancer survivor and Dallas, Texas-based Certified Life Coach and Psychotherapist, has placed thousands of people on the right track to self-empowerment via a plan she calls the 5 C Process. The journey challenges individuals to:

One

Clarify Current View – Where are you now- honestly?

Conscious awareness of your current view is the first step in becoming the best you can be. Getting clear about how your life aligns with your values, talents and unique gifts is vital to your happiness. You need to know where you are in order to learn where you want to go.

You can clarify your current view by completing a review of eight life areas. Be honest with yourself about how happy are you with your profession, finances, health and overall well-being, primary relationships, personal development, spirituality, environment, hobbies, etc.

Two

Connect with Your Highest Vision – Where do you want to be?

Example: A client of mine, a yoga instructor, decided she was happy teaching but wanted to contribute to the world on a larger level. She wasn’t happy with the quality of the yoga clothing that was accessible to her and her fellow yogis. Her vision was to design and create fun, hip and timeless yoga clothes using eco-conscious fabrics.

You have to get really clear about what you want. It is crucial that you connect to your highest vision of yourself because you can’t create it unless you are clear about what it looks like. If you don’t have a vision of where you want to go or what you want to be, you will most likely NOT get there. To quote Henrietta Klauser, “If you have a connection to what you want, take the next step and write it down.” If you don’t have any idea about what you want, or how you want to be in life to bring about greater happiness, begin looking through magazines and create a Vision Board/Collage of what attracts you. You may also want to consider getting an outside perspective from a friend or a professional coach. I take my clients through a guided imagery that gives them a glimpse of what their future could look like. There are also books that can help guide you. Just get help assessing your talents, divine gifts and abilities and then determine how you want to use them more fully in the world. We can’t help others as fully, if we are not aware of how we can best serve. So instead of thinking of it as selfish to engage in knowing yourself better, I would suggest you consider it selfish to hold back and not be the best you can be. Only in this way, can we help the world and others.

Three

Create Inspiring Goals – How will you get there?

Example: My client created a tiered plan of what needed to happen step by step – outer goal. All of this was influenced by her inner goal of keeping a measured pace and a balanced life. Her goal was to enjoy the process.

You have to create a plan and take specific actions to get you from where you are now to where you want to be. When most people write goals, they just write a list of action steps, usually external actions. I believe it is more powerful to have inner and outer goals. An outer goal is what you want. For instance, you might think, “I want a new house”. An inner goal is more focused on the how. How will a new home benefit me and my family? Will it offer more common gathering areas, a larger kitchen so that we can cook together, etc.? How can I appreciate what I have now until I get this home? How can I make this a joyful experience rather than a stressful one? If you can not be grateful for what you have now, then when you get a new home, it will only create very short-term happiness for you. Then, you will be focused on the next external illusion of happiness. For 2008, I suggest taking at least three of the life areas I mentioned earlier and jot down how you couldbenefit from living your highest vision in each area. Next, add action steps toward your desired achievements along with completion dates.

Four

Clear Obstacles – How will you remove obstacles in your way?

We all have dreams and visions for our life, but frankly, there are many things that can get in the way. The two most common obstacles I see with my clients are:

The inability to say NO— In order to bridge the gap from your current view to your highest vision, you have to make room for what “Could Be”. If your life is full and you want to add more of the things that are truly important in your life, you should start the change process by making room first. You must say no to some things in your life, so you can say yes to what is most important. You have to give up the destructive habits, behaviors and activities to make room for new ones.

A metaphor would be a water hose watering a flowering plant. The water in the hose is your life force and the flowering plant is what you are trying to grow in your life. If the water hose has leaks, it will not have enough water or life force/energy to reach its desired outcome or vision (to grow the plant into full bloom). Examples of leaks might include toxic friendships, unrealistic expectations, watching too much television, eating sugar, overspending, negative relational patterns with your spouse or working on an outdated job.

Example: A client’s obstacle here was that her 8- year-old daughter needed caring for and she was afraid she wouldn’t be able to be a good mother plus jumpstart a successful, new business. We remedied this issue by getting clear on the proper definition of a good mother. Also, practically speaking, she needed help picking up her daughter from school. So she got her husband to assist her in this area so she would have time to create this new business.

Negative self-talk—Research shows we have approximately 50,000 internal messages we say to ourselves daily. We are constantly walking around having conversations with ourselves. And it is what we say that makes all the difference in the overall quality of our lives.

Example: I was once in Starbucks, and I watched this woman spill her coffee while reaching for a sugar packet and I heard her say out loud, “I’m so stupid. I can’t believe I did that.”

Now, I just happen to hear her, but this is an example of something you might say internally as well. You might think, “No big deal. I say things like this to myself all the time.” Well, IT IS A BIG DEAL as our subconscious hears these messages and acts on them as if they were real. Don’t say anything to yourself that you wouldn’t want someone else saying to you.

Think of self-talk like mental fuel. Now, imagine filling your car with dirty water. We all know you wouldn’t get very far. Now, take that same car and fill it with high quality gasoline. You’ll most likely reach your destination. It is the same with people and the words we use. If the words are negative and toxic, we will sputter along with low energy and our performance suffers. If our words are positive and tender, we will feel confident, energized, encouraged and will most likely meet our goals faster and easier. Here are some key things to remember if you ever find yourself preparing to board the train of BAD self-talk:

B– stands for belittling self-talk. Stop telling yourself, “I am not good enough.” If your dream is to have a healthy self-confidence, which of the following examples is more likely to get your there:

A. “I’m so stupid. I can’t believe I did that.”

B. “Whoops, mistakes happen.”

Can you see how the Answer B is much kinder?

A – stands for awfulizing. Stop predicting a future filled with gloom and doom, and dwelling on scary thoughts. If you dream of obtaining a career you love, which of the following will move you closer to your vision:

A. “I did terribly on my interview, I’ll never find a job I like.”

B. “I will answer that question on past employment differently next time and I will ace it! I know I will one day have the job I love.”

Can you see how Answer B places you in the mindset of a successful job search?

D – stands for deceiving. This is when you deceive yourself into thinking you are a victim, and that other people are to blame for your circumstances. If we want a happy relationship which will of the below responses will aid in achieving this goal:

A. “If my spouse would only do more around the house, then I would be happy.”

B. “I can and will choose happiness today, no matter what my spouse does.”

Answer B is the right choice, wouldn’t you agree?

S – stands for shoulding – This is when you give yourself a lot of shoulds, musts, and ought tos, then beat yourself up for not living up to unrealistic standards. Say your dream is to be in top physical condition, which will further that:

A. “I should have eaten a salad for lunch instead of that big ol’ hamburger. I’m such a pig!”

B. “I could have eaten a salad, but I chose not to. Tomorrow I will make healthier choices.”

The second choice is so much more inspiring, don’t you think?

Five

Commit to Action – Are you willing to do what it takes?

The final step of the 5 C Process is to commit to action. How many times have we all made plans and never carried them out, or started off excited and lost motivation? No one ever does anything great alone. We all need encouragement and support from others including an accountability partner who is willing to help hold the vision of the person you want to be. In the previous example of my client, her biggest negative self-talk was how to be a good mom and a good business woman. Her thoughts were, “If I don’t pick up my child every day from school, I am a bad mother.” Instead, we replaced it with, “Picking up my child from school daily is not what makes me a good mother. I am, indeed, a fabulous mother.”

Here are the four action steps that have been proven to help you eliminate your negative self talk:

• Become aware of your negative messages –listen to voice in head

• Stop! You have to stop immediately if you find yourself dwelling on any negative thoughts

• Replace negative thoughts with a kinder alternatives

• Practice. It takes a commitment of time in order to turn a pattern of negative thinking into a more positive train of thought.

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Laughter Is Truly The Best Medicine

If there's one thing I have to admit about my mother is that she was always right about this: Laughter Is The Best Medicine.

If you can't laugh about yourself and the things that happen to you - you're headed for a heart attack or some other malady, it's the way the body works. Laughter lightens the moment and strips away the seriousness that many of us approach life with; it releases the pain and chases away your personal rainstorms leaving a bright sunshiny day.

Scientists have also discovered that laughter strengthens your immune system and increases your cardiovascular flexibility (your blood vessels exercise through dilation).

According to Dr. Goodheart, the laughter doctor, laughter convulses your diaphragm, which in turn massages your internal organs. Massaged internal organs are happy internal organs and they cooperate by staying plump and juicy.

She says that laughter also causes you to gulp in large portions of air, oxygenating your blood. When that air is expelled, it's been clocked at 70 miles an hour, providing the lungs with an excellent workout. By laughing, she says, you lose muscle control, which relaxes the skeletal system. According to Dr. Goodheart, four-year-olds laugh 500 times a day, while adults laugh a mere 15! She's convinced that if we laugh as much as a four-year old, we've have the heart rate and blood pressure of that same child.

On top of all that, she continues, laughter causes the brain to produce hormones called beta endorphins which reduce pain and causes our adrenal glands to manufacture cortisol, which is a natural anti-inflammatory that's wonderful for arthritis.

Laughter also provides a catharsis, which means to purify or purge, to the emotions. It also brings about a spiritual renewal or release from tension. You notice how sometimes you'll see a comedian on television, and while he may not be that funny, something just makes you laugh uproariously? Your body seems to know that it needs the chemicals that are released through laughter.

I've always felt better after a good belly laugh or two. For me that means some very large-sounding snorts and a few donkey brays thrown into the bargain. Some people won't even go to the movie with me because when I start laughing I cannot stop. My daughters always used to go, Mom! as they slunk down into their seats trying not to be seen.

When someone's laughing, others laugh along. It's contagious. You can't help it. Oftentimes in my movie-theater laughter excursions, I have motivated a whole theater-full of people laughing right along with me. All this during the credits! (John Belushi being escorted through the prison in the opening credit scenes of The Blues Brothers. If you notice very carefully, while walking he has his butt cheeks pressed ever so tightly together as he's leaving the prison. It was a subtle physical comment that kept me laughing. The more people turned and looked at me, the harder I laughed! Finally, they just gave up and joined me!).

The Difference between Laughter, Humor, Teasing and Tickling

However, there is a difference between laughter, humor, teasing or tickling. Humor is your way of looking at the world, it's an intellectual exercise. It's your idea of what's funny; it's not the actual act of laughing.

Teasing and tickling are really a way of ridiculing someone. Tickling is something beyond someone's control and is actually a physical invasion of sorts. Children laugh when you tickle them because the body works that way, but it's actually a form of emotional ridicule that can result in very unpleasant feelings.

Teasing usually has an edge to it. People say they're teasing, but essentially they are dead serious. I think teasing is a passive-aggressive way of hurting someone through the guise of humor. Teasing, according to Dr. Goodheart, "involves our having information about something that another person has very strong feelings about - usually painful feelings - and then bringing that information up without permission." She also says that as people become very good friends they might give each other permission unconsciously to push each other's buttons. Husbands, wives, lovers, and friends play with each other's pain with permission. "When you tease without permission in order to trigger laughter, it's very manipulative and controlling."

All in all, when you're feeling down and need a lift, try laughter. It may be hard at first, but just try laughing. Force yourself. Pretty soon, you'll find yourself laughing at your own laughter and the looks you get from your family members. They'll begin to wonder what's so funny and the corners of their mouths will crinkle up in the beginning of a smile. Now you're laughing because they give you these quizzical looks wondering what you're laughing about.

Pretty soon, your laugh is real, your belly aches, the tears flow from your eyes, and the world takes on a different hue.

As for me when I laugh like this, I need Depends. I laugh so hard sometimes I wet my pants and that has nothing to do with my age.

I can still hear my friend's mom yelling at me today nearly 38 years later (while grinning ear to ear) to get off her brocade couch whenever I started laughing.

She knew what would happen.

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Creating Your Vision

"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one" Albert Einstein

I feel that one of the most important ingredients in your formula for success is having a clearly defined and vivid vision of where you want to be. At first the “how” is not that important, you need to create a vision that gets you so excited that you develop the mentality that you will stop at nothing to get what you want. Many people first focus on the how than very quickly find themselves overwhelmed with too many details and just as quickly talk them selves out of pursuing their goals. You have to take a leap of faith and trust that the how will be shown to you as you go along. Do you remember the days as a kid with dreams of epic proportions? What happened those dreams? You got older and domesticated by a society that says that having those dreams is foolish. That’s nonsense, why wouldn’t you want to accomplish the things that even as a kid you knew would make you happy. I encourage you to dream like you once used to.

“Shoot for the moon…even if you

Miss you’ll still be amongst them stars”- Beanie Sigel(rap artist)

One way I keep myself motivated and keep my vision alive is through my picture book. In my book I have everything that I want and every morning I look at it to remind me what I want in life. Go right now and get some magazines and cut out every picture of the things you want and places you want to visit, don’t be thinking if you can actually get those things now, dare to dream. Remember your mind thinks in pictures, look at your picture book until in becomes as vivid as possible in the theater of your mind. Your mind cant tell the difference between something you remember or something you experience in real time.

Visualization Exercises(meditation):

(Please read this whole section, I will explain why almost all self help fails to produce the results people want)

You can think of meditation as conscious sleeping. Just as you sleep to gain energy for your daily functioning, meditation is conscious sleeping that gives you all the energy(creative abilities) you need for what you intend to accomplish.

I also use lucid dreaming as another way to increase creativity, I will soon write a hub on lucid dreaming.(Lucid dreaming is when you actually become aware in your dream that you are dreaming, once properly trained you can control your dreams)

Use the power of meditation to help you achieve your goals. Strive to everyday meditate one minute for each year of your current age. I am 24, so everyday I try and meditate at least 24 minutes. If you are new to meditation check out this website on transcendental meditation .There are many techniques find something that feels good to you.

Quantum Mind Power

Daily Routine:

1. Pick a nice comfortable place where to meditate. Have an intention on what you plan to meditate on before hand. Ex. A destination you want to visit.

2. Find a comfortable position to sit. Sitting on a chair or on the floor, does not really matter as long as it is comfortable for you.

3. Cross your legs, clasp your hands together.(this helps make your own energy circuit and gives stability)

4.Close your eyes, than stop inner and outer chatter.

5. Relax, begin thinking that your whole body is becoming extremely relaxed.

6. Eyes should be closed.

7. You will notice that your mind is full of many thoughts. Your mind will than begin to ask questions to those thoughts and try and come up with answers whether they are known or unknown. This is why your mind(ego) can be your enemy if it mostly thinks in negative terms.

8. You will need to transcend your mind and thoughts in order to meditate. Your mind and thoughts are what separate you from your higher self, you can also think of your higher self as your subconscious mind don't worry about the labels.

9. You transcend your mind by simply observing your breath. Don't inhale/exhale consciously just observe your natural breathing. Don't go behind your thoughts, if you catch your self drifting just always come back to your breathing. Slowly the amount of thoughts reduces and your breathing becomes thinner and shorter. If you are able to keep all your focus on your breath, you will get to the point of no thought and no breath. This state of no thought is your connection to your divine being and energy body. The more you meditate the more benefits and energy that you will receive. Your own self awareness and consciousness will also expand.

10. You will feel a very pleasurable feeling meditating. If you feel any discomfort in your body these can be possible areas of disease or illness. If you meditate everyday you will heal your body naturally.

11. Now that you are in a state of no thought and total relaxation. Begin to think only on your intention. Remember whatever you think now is in a state that will be impregnated directly into your subconscious. It is incredibly important that you don't color any of your thoughts with any lack,limitation,dis belief or doubt. This is why almost all self help material does not produce the results people expect. Wishing for more money(or anything else) never works, the thought of wanting more money also has the thought of doubt attached to it. Ask your self how many thoughts that you think about have been modified in a way that is not beneficial to you. You just never realize that you are programming your sub conscious all day. This is why meditation is so powerful. You are able to make suggestions to your subconscious where the thought is not modified in any way shape or form. So if you want to make things happen fast you need to get rid of the concept of attaching time to yourthoughts. You have to remember that everything you get in your life comes based on the conditions that you set up and time is usually one condition that cuases the most frustration with people. Just as a computer programmer gives a computer instructions to complete a task, you program the most powerful computer you have which is your subconscious. Your conscious mind acts as the gate keeper as to what thoughts you let in. Now that you know this choose to become more aware and conscious about what you think all day long. Learn to see the world in a non linear way, remove time from your consiousness and watch how things show up in your life faster than you ever thought.

Thoughts = feelings = actions = results (just like that you can begin to shape your life)

12. Mentally rehearse every moment of it with all your senses. Dare to be like Peter Pan :)

13. Visualize in vivid detail, your intention as established fact. Also make sure you meditate only on days you feel good. Remember you want your thoughts to be as pure as possible. This also means that you really find out what you want, make sure its not something you want solely for ego purposes. Thoughts that involve the ego are usually always colored with negativity.

14. With time you will begin to be able to hold vivid pictures of anything(you will develop you third eye). The more you are able to hold onto an image in your mind the more power you give it.

15. Get up and go have a great day :) notice how much energy you have the rest of the day. As you advance in your discipline, you will have a lot of fun basically creating your day before it starts.

Beliefs:

To start making that vision a reality you will have to change some of your beliefs and adopt beliefs that will help you reach your goals. Because if you have this great vision of you retiring on your own private beach but deep down you don’t believe you can do it, you have already sabotaged yourself. Your desire and your belief are in conflict with each other and therefore you will not manifest what it is that you want into your life. If you want to be a good leader one day but you currently have the belief that you are a shy person, it will not happen. You need to truly make a decision to adopt the belief that you are really outgoing. When you truly decide to do something you will find a way to do it.

“Nothing happens unless first a dream” – Carl Sandburg

Some Ways to shape your beliefs:

1. Always think Success- as soon as you think about failure forget about it and don’t let anymore negative thoughts snowball. The more attention you give a thought the more powerful it will become than you will make it harder for yourself to get back to a productive mind state. The only way to change how you feel is to think about something else. Whenever you feel doubt, fear, and failure creeping into your mind have a default thought that you can use to avoid giving attention to mental poison. As soon as I feel I am entertaining thoughts of negativity I immediately begin to think about relaxing on a beach and affirm to myself that “I attract abundance to all areas of my life”. The more I try and have the feelings of being on the beach with no worries and remind myself that I am in complete control of how I feel, I immediately feel the negativity begin to melt away as I begin to focus on my new positive thought.

2. Develop the belief that you are better than you currently feel- don’t look at your weaknesses as a burden but as an opportunity to improve your self. When I find something I don’t like about my personality I don’t get down on myself for it, I just realize that now I have something I can work on to make myself better. Most importantly love and accept who you are, not who you will or should be.

3. Believe that sky’s the limit- if you have little goals you will have little success, the bigger your dreams the more potential for your possible success. Even If you think your dream is too big, strive to reach that dream, because you will end up at a better place than if you would have set your sights on a smaller goal. The trick is to really believe you can do it, this just isn’t wishful thinking. Wishful thinking never got anyone anything, you need to find out what you want and get out there and get it. If you really want that house on the beach your mind will come up with ways to help you get it.(develop faith in your self)

How to remove junk beliefs:

1. Meditate on your old belief and tell the truth about it. Now replace it with a belief that will better serve you. Meditate on it until you feel you have changed that belief.

Now when you accept these beliefs it means you will have to raise your standards and develop a strategy that will put you on the road to accomplish what you set forth. Do whatever you have to do. Read any books that will spark your interest or help you discover any distinctions that will point you in the right direction. Find a role model, a person who has already accomplished what you want. Find out what some of their beliefs, interests, body language, image, etc. is and adopt them as your own. Your role model can serve as a blue print, the goal is to cut down on the trial and error so you can get where you want faster than you ever thought possible. You can take all the qualities from all the people you admire and add your own personal touch. Just think of if it as if you are trying to build the person you want and know you can be. Thomas Edison is one of the greatest inventors in history, he was able to elaborate, modify and adapt on other peoples ideas. You don’t have torecreate the wheel just constantly be aware of any success ingredients you come across and make them part of your identity. Think of your mind as a warehouse the more you learn and store will eventually serve as an inventory for future reference, which will breed new ideas and perspectives.

Consistency is key we are all creatures of patterns and habits. In order to become the person you desire to be, start by changing your patterns. Think of all the quality traits you must possess, make a pattern which uses those traits efficiently than strive to be consistent. Consistency will develop into habits and this is key because if you fail to be consistent with your actions you will not be consistent with who you desire to be. This lack of confusion between your actions and what your mind knows you are capable of leads to tremendous amounts of stress, confusion, and even depression. Many other consequences also come from a lack of consistency.

This is why awareness of self is critical; you need to be constantly evaluating your self. Decide if the persona you are currently displaying is the reality that you want for yourself,because with enough time thats what your reality will become.

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